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We thought this section of this document might help you to focus a bit on the Purpose of Marriage Preparation before you actually come on your marriage preparation weekend.
The
Purpose of Marriage Preparation excerpt from
Familiaris Consortio by Pope John Paul II
In a particular way the church addresses the young,
who are beginning their journey toward marriage and family life, for the
purpose of presenting them with new horizons, helping them to discover
the beauty and grandeur of the vocation to love and the service of life.
66.
Preparation for marriage.
More than ever necessary in our times is preparation of young people for
marriage and family life. In some countries it is still the families themselves
that, according to ancient customs, ensure the passing on to young people
of the values concerning married and family life, and they do this through
a gradual process of education or initiation. But the changes that have
taken place within almost all modern societies demand that not only the
family but also society and the church should be involved in the effort
of properly preparing young people for their future responsibilities.
Many negative phenomena which are today noted with regret in family life
derive from the fact that in the new situations young people not only
lost sight of the correct hierarchy of values but, since they have no
longer certain criteria of behavior, they do not know how to face and
deal with the new difficulties. But experience teaches that young people
who have been well prepared for family life generally succeed better than
others.
This is even more applicable to Christian marriage, which influences the
holiness of large numbers of men and women. The church must therefore
promote better and more intensive programs of marriage preparation in
order to eliminate as far as possible the difficulties that many married
couples find themselves in, and even more in order to favor positively
the establishing and maturing of successful marriages.
Marriage preparation has to be seen and put into practice as a gradual
and continuous process. It includes three main stages: remote, proximate
and immediate preparation.
Remote preparation begins in early childhood in that wise family training
which leads children to discover themselves as beings endowed with a rich
and complex psychology and with a particular personality with its own
strengths and weaknesses. It is the period when esteem for all authentic
human values is instilled, both in interpersonal and in social relationships,
with all that this signifies for the formation of character, for the control
and right use of one's inclinations, for the manner of regarding and meeting
people of the opposite sex, and so on. Also necessary, especially for
Christians, is solid spiritual and catechetical formation that will show
that marriage is a true vocation and mission, without excluding the possibility
of the total gift of self to God in the vocation to the priestly or religious
life.
Upon this basis there will subsequently and gradually be built up the
proximate preparation, which -- from a suitable age and with adequate
catechesis, as in a catechumenal process -- involves a more specific preparation
for the sacraments, as it were, a rediscovery of them. This renewed catechesis
of young people and others preparing for Christian marriage is absolutely
necessary in order that the sacrament may be celebrated and lived with
the right moral and spiritual dispositions. The religious formation of
young people should be integrated, at the right moment and in accordance
with the various concrete requirements, with a preparation for life as
a couple. This preparation will present marriage as an interpersonal relationship
of a man and a woman that has to be continually developed, and will encourage
those concerned to study the nature of conjugal sexuality and responsible
parenthood, with the essential medical and biological knowledge connected
with it. It will also acquaint those concerned with correct methods for
the education of children and will assist them in gaining the basic requisites
for well-ordered family life, such as stable work, sufficient financial
resources, sensible administration, notions of housekeeping.
Finally, one must not overlook preparation for the family apostolate,
for fraternal solidarity and collaboration with other families, for active
membership in groups, associations, movements and undertakings set up
for the human and Christian benefit of the family.
The immediate preparation for the celebration of the sacrament of matrimony
should take place in the months and weeks immediately preceding the wedding
so as to give a new meaning, content, and form to the so-called premarital
inquiry required by canon law. This preparation is not only necessary
in every case, but is also more urgently needed for engaged couples that
still manifest shortcomings or difficulties in Christian doctrine and
practice.
Among the elements to be instilled in this journey of faith, which is
similar to the catechumate, there must also be a deeper knowledge of the
mystery of Christ and the church, of the meaning of grace and of the responsibility
of Christian marriage, as well as preparation for taking an active and
conscious part in the rites of the marriage liturgy.
The Christian family and the whole of the ecclesial community should feel
involved in the different phases of the preparation for marriage which
have been described only in their broad outlines. It is to be hoped that
the episcopal conferences, just as they are concerned with appropriate
initiatives to help engaged couples to be more aware of the seriousness
of their choice and also to help pastors of souls to make sure of the
couples' proper dispositions, so they will also take steps to see that
there is issued a directory for the pastoral care of the family. In this
they should lay down in the first place, the minimum content, duration
and method of the "preparation courses," balancing the different
aspects -- doctrinal, pedagogical, legal and medical -- concerning marriage
and structuring them in such a way that those preparing for marriage will
not only receive an intellectual training, but will also feel a desire
to enter actively into the ecclesial community.
Although one must not underestimate the necessity and obligation of the
immediate preparation for marriage -- which would happen if dispensations
from it were easily given -- nevertheless such preparation must always
be set forth and put into practice in such a way that omitting it is not
an impediment to the celebration of marriage.
End of Section 66.
See below for entire document:
Apostolic Exhortation
FAMILIARIS CONSORTIO (On the Family)
of His Holiness, Pope John Paul II to the Episcopate, to the Clergy and
to the Faithful of the Whole Catholic Church Regarding the Role of the
Christian Family in the Modern World
December 15, 1981.
INTRODUCTION ------------
1. The Church at the Service of the Family. -------------------------------------------
The family in the modern world, as much as and perhaps more than any other
institution, has been beset by the many profound and rapid changes that
have affected society and culture. Many families are living this situation
in fidelity to those values that constitute the foundation of the institution
of the family. Others have become uncertain and bewildered over their
role or even doubtful and almost unaware of the ultimate meaning and truth
of conjugal and family life. Finally, there are others who are hindered
by various situations of injustice in the realization of their fundamental
rights.
Knowing that marriage and the family constitute one of the most precious
of human values, the church wishes to speak and offer her help to those
who are already aware of the value of marriage and the family and seek
to live it faithfully, to those who are uncertain and anxious and searching
for the truth, and to those who are unjustly impeded from living freely
their family lives. Supporting the first, illumination the second and
assisting the others, the church offers her services to every person who
wonders about the destiny of marriage and the family [1].
In a particular way the church addresses the young, who are beginning
their journey toward marriage and family life, for the purpose of presenting
them with new horizons, helping them to discover the beauty and grandeur
of the vocation to love and the service of life.
2. The Synod of 1980 in Continuity with Preceding Synods --------------------------------------------------------
A Sign of this profound interest of the church in the family was the last
Synod of Bishops, held in Rome from Sept. 26 to Oct. 25, 1980. This was
a natural continuation of the two preceding synods [2]: The Christian
family, in fact, is the first community called to announce the Gospel
to the human person during growth and to bring him or her, through a progressive
education and catechesis, to full human and Christian maturity.
Furthermore, the recent synod is logically connected in some way as well
with that on the ministerial priesthood and on justice in the modern world.
In fact, as an educating community, the family must help man to discern
his own vocation and to accept responsibility in the search for greater
justice, educating him from the beginning in interpersonal relationships,
rich in justice and in love.
At the close of their assembly, the synod fathers presented me with a
long list of proposals in which they had gathered the fruits of their
reflections, which had matured over intense days of work, and they asked
me unanimously to be a spokesman before humanity of the church's lively
care for the family and to give suitable indications for renewed pastoral
effort in this fundamental sector of the life of man and of the church.
As I fulfill that mission with this exhortation, thus actuating in a particular
matter the apostolic ministry with which I am entrusted, I wish to thank
all the members of the synod for the very valuable contribution of teaching
and experience that they made, especially through the *propositiones*,
the text of which I am entrusting to the Pontifical Council for the Family
with instructions to study it so as to bring out every aspect of its rich
content.
3. The Precious Value of Marriage and of the Family. ----------------------------------------------------
Illuminated by the faith that gives her an understanding of all the truth
concerning the great value of marriage and the family and their deepest
meaning, the church once again feels the pressing need to proclaim the
Gospel, that is the "good news," to all people without exception,
in particular to those who are called to marriage and are preparing for
it, to all married couples and parents in the world.
The church is deeply convinced that only by the acceptance of the Gospel
are the hopes that man legitimately places in marriage and in the family
capable of being fulfilled.
Willed by God in the very act of creation [3], marriage and the family
are interiorly ordained to fulfillment in Christ [4] and have need of
his graces in order to be healed from the wounds of sin [5] and restored
to their "beginning" [6], that is, to full understanding and
the full realization of God's plan.
At a moment of history in which the family is the object of numerous forces
that seek to destroy it or in some way to deform it, and aware that the
well-being of society and her own good are intimately tied to the good
of the family [7], the church perceives in a more urgent and compelling
way her mission of proclaiming to all people the plan of God for marriage
and the family, ensuring their full vitality and human and Christian development,
and thus contributing to the renewal of society and of the people of God.
------------------------------------------------------------------- Footnotes:
[1] Cf. Second Vatican Council GAUDIUM ET SPES, 52.
[2] Cf. John Paul II, Homily for the Opening of the Sixth Synod of Bishops
(Sept. 26, 1980), 2: AAS 72 (1980), 1008.
[3] Cf. Gn. 1-2.
[4] Cf. Eph. 5.
[5] Cf. Second Vatican Council, GAUDIUM ET SPES, 47; Pope John Paul II,
Letter APOPROPINQUAT IAM (Aug 15, 1980), 1: AAS 72 (1980), 791.
[6] Cf. Mt. 19:4.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
PART ONE BRIGHT SPOTS AND SHADOWS FOR THE FAMILY TODAY
4. The Need to Understand the Situation. ----------------------------------------
Since God's plan for marriage and the family touches men and women in
the concreteness of their daily existence in specific social and cultural
situations, the church ought to apply herself to understanding the situations
within which marriage and the family are lived today, in order to fulfill
her task of serving [8].
This understanding is therefore an inescapable requirement of the work
of evangelization. It is, in fact, to the families of our times that the
church must bring the unchangeable and ever new gospel of Jesus Christ,
just as it is the families involved in the present conditions of the world
that are called to accept and to live the plan of God that pertains to
them. Moreover, the call and demands of the spirit resound in the very
events of history, and so the church can also be guided to a more profound
understanding of the inexhaustible mystery of marriage and the family
by the circumstances, the questions and the anxieties and hopes of the
young people, married couples and parents of today [9].
To this ought to be added a further reflection of particular importance
at the present time. Not infrequently ideas and solutions which are very
appealing, but which obscure in varying degrees the truth and the dignity
of the human person, are offered to men and women of today in their sincere
and deep search for a response to the important daily problems that affect
their married and family life. These views are often supported by the
powerful and pervasive organization of the means of social communication,
which subtly endangers freedom and the means of objective judgement.
Many are already aware of this danger to the human person and are working
for the truth. The church, with her evangelical discernment, joins with
them, offering her own service to the truth, to freedom and to the dignity
of every man and every woman.
8. Evangelical Discernment. ---------------------------
The discernment effected by the church becomes the offering of an orientation
in order that the entire truth and the full dignity of marriage and the
family may be preserved and realized.
This discernment is accomplished through the sense of faith [10], which
is a gift that the Spirit gives to all the faithful [11], and is therefore
the work of the whole church according to the diversity of the various
gifts and charisms that, together with and according to the responsibility
proper to each one, work together for a more profound understanding and
activation of the word of God. The church, therefore, does not accomplish
this discernment only through the pastors, who teach in the name and with
the power of Christ, but also through the laity: Christ "made them
his witnesses and gave them understanding of the faith and the grace of
speech (Acts 2:17-18; Rv. 19:10), so that the power of the Gospel might
shine forth in their daily social and family life" [12]. The laity,
moreover, by reason of their particular vocation have the specific role
of interpreting the history of the world in the light of Christ, inasmuch
as they are called to illuminate and organize temporal realities according
to the plan of God, creator and redeemer.
The "supernatural sense of faith" [13], however, does not consist
solely or necessarily in the consensus of the faithful. Following Christ,
the church seeks the truth, which is not always the same as the majority
opinion. She listens to conscience and not to power, and in this way she
defends the poor and downtrodden. The church values sociological and statistical
research when it proves helpful in understanding the historical context
in which pastoral action has to be developed and when it leads to a better
understanding of the truth. Such research alone, however, is not to be
considered in itself an expression of the sense of faith.
Because it is the task of the apostolic ministry to ensure that the church
remains in the truth of Christ and to lead her ever more deeply into that
truth, the pastors must promote the sense of faith in all the faithful,
examine and authoratively judge the genuineness of its expressions and
educate the faithful in an ever more mature evangelical discernment [14].
Christian spouses and parents can and should offer their unique and irreplaceable
contribution to the elaboration of an authentic evangelical discernment
in the various situations and cultures in which men and women live their
marriage and their family life. They are qualified for this role by their
charism or special gift, the gift of the sacrament of matrimony [15].
6. The Situation of the Family in the World Today. --------------------------------------------------
The situation in which the family finds itself presents positive and negative
aspects: The first is a sign of the salvation of Christ operating in the
world; the second, a sign of the refusal that man gives to the love of
God.
On the one hand, in fact, there is a more lively awareness of personal
freedom and greater attention to the quality of interpersonal relationships
in marriage, in promoting the dignity of women, to responsible procreation,
to the education of children. There is also an awareness of the need for
the development of interfamily relationships, for reciprocal spiritual
and material assistance, the rediscovery of the ecclesial mission proper
to the family and its responsibility for the building of a more just society.
On the other hand, however, signs are not lacking of a disturbing degradation
of some fundamental values: a mistaken theoretical and practical concept
of the independence of the spouses in relation to each other; serious
misconceptions regarding the relationship of authority between parents
and children; the concrete difficulties that the family itself experiences
in the transmission of values; the growing number of divorces; the scourge
of abortion; the ever more frequent recourse to sterilization; the appearance
of a truly contraceptive mentality.
At the root of these negative phenomena there frequently lies a corruption
of the idea and the experience of freedom, conceived not as a capacity
for realizing the truth of God's plan for marriage and the family, but
as an autonomous power of self-affirmation, often against others, for
one's own selfish well-being.
Worthy of our attention also is the fact in the countries of the so-called
Third World, families often lack both the means necessary for survival,
such as food, work, housing and medicine, and the most elementary freedoms.
In the richer countries, on the contrary, excessive prosperity and the
consumer mentality, paradoxically joined to a certain anguish and uncertainty
about the future, deprive married couples of the generosity and courage
needed for raising up new human life: Thus life is often perceived not
as a blessing but as a danger from which to defend oneself.
The historical situation in which the family lives therefore appears as
an interplay of light and darkness.
This shows that history is not simply a fixed progression toward what
is better, but rather an event of freedom, and even a struggle between
freedoms that are in mutual conflict, that is, according to the wellknown
expression of St. Augustine, a conflict between two loves: the love of
God to the point of disregarding self, and the love of self to the point
of disregarding God [16].
It follows that only an education for love rooted in faith can lead to
the capacity of interpreting "the signs of the times," which
are the historical expression of this twofold love.
7. The Influence of Circumstances on the Consciences of the ------ -----------------------------------------------------
Faithful. ---------
Living in such a world, under the pressures coming above all from the
mass media, the faithful do not always remain immune from the obscuring
of certain fundamental values, nor set themselves up as the critical conscience
of the family culture and as active agents in the building of an authentic
family humanism.
Among the more troubling signs of this phenomenon, the synod fathers stressed
the following in particular: the spread of divorce and of recourse to
a new union, even on the part of the faithful; the acceptance of purely
civil marriage in contradiction of the vocation of the baptized to "be
married in the Lord"; the celebration of the marriage sacrament without
living faith, but for other motives; the rejection of moral norms that
guide and promote human and Christian exercise of sexuality in marriage.
8. Our Age Needs Wisdom. ------------------------
The whole church is obliged to a deep reflection and commitment, so that
the new culture now emerging may be evangelized in depth, true values
acknowledged, the rights of men and women defended and justice promoted
in the very structures of society. In this way the "new humanism"
will not distract people from their relationship with God, but will lead
them to it more fully.
Science and its technical applications offer new and immense possibilities
in the construction of such a humanism. Still, as a consequence of political
choices that decide the direction of research and its applications, science
is often used against its original purpose, which is the advancement of
the human person.
It becomes necessary, therefore, on the part of all to recover an awareness
of the primacy of moral values, which are the values of the human person
as such. The great task that has to be faced today for the renewal of
society is that of recapturing the ultimate meaning of life and its fundamental
values. Only an awareness of the primacy of these values enables man to
use the immense possibilities given him by science in such a way as to
bring about the true advancement of the human person in his or her whole
truth, in his or her freedom and dignity. Science is called to ally itself
with wisdom.
The following words of the Second Vatican Council can therefore be applied
to the problems of the family: "Our era needs such wisdom more than
bygone ages if the discoveries made by man are to be further humanized.
For the future of the world stands in peril unless wiser people are forthcoming"
[17].
The education of the moral conscience, which makes every human being capable
of judging and of discerning the proper ways to achieve self-realization
according to his or her original truth, thus becomes a pressing requirement
that cannot be renounced.
Modern culture must be led to a more profoundly restored covenant with
divine wisdom. Every man is given a share of such wisdom through the creating
action of God. And it is only in faithfulness to this covenant that the
families of today will be in a position to influence positively the building
of a more just and fraternal world.
9. Gradualness and Conversion. ------------------------------
To the injustice originating from sin -- which has profoundly penetrated
the structures of today's world -- and often hindering the family's full
realization of itself and of its fundamental rights, we must all set ourselves
in opposition through a conversion of mind and heart, following Christ
crucified by denying our own selfishness: Such a conversion cannot fail
to have a beneficial and renewing influence even on the structures of
society.
What is needed is a continuous, permanent conversion which, while requiring
an interior detachment from every evil and an adherence to good in its
fullness, is brought about concretely in steps which leads us gradually
with the progressive integration of the gifts of God and the demands of
his definitive and absolute love in the entire personal and social life
of man. Therefore an educational growth process is necessary in order
that individual believers, families and peoples, even civilization itself,
by beginning from what they have already received of the mystery of Christ,
may patiently be led forward, arriving at a richer understanding and a
fuller integration of this mystery in their lives.
10. Inculturation. ------------------
In conformity with her constant tradition, the church receives from the
various cultures everything that is able to express better the unsearchable
riches of Christ [18]. Only with the help of all the cultures will it
be possible for these riches to be manifested ever more clearly and for
the church to progress toward a daily, more complete and profound awareness
of the truth, which has already been given to her in its entirety by the
Lord.
Holding fast to the two principles of the compatibility with the Gospel
of the various cultures to be taken up and of communion with the universal
church, there must be further study, particularly by the episcopal conferences
and the appropriate departments of the Roman Curia, and greater pastoral
diligence so that this "inculturation" of the Christian faith
may come about ever more extensively in the context of marriage and the
family as well as in other fields.
It is by means of "inculturation" that one proceeds toward the
full restoration of the covenant with the wisdom of God, which is Christ
himself. The whole church will be enriched also by the cultures which,
though lacking technology, abound in human wisdom and are enlivened by
profound moral values.
So that the goal of this journey might be clear and consequently the way
plainly indicated, the synod was right to begin by considering in depth
the original design of God for marriage and the family: It "went
back to the beginning," in deference to the teaching of Christ [19].
-------------------------------------------------------------- Footnotes:
[8] Cf. John Paul II, Address to the Council of the General Secretariat
of the Synod of Bishops (Feb. 23, 1980): INSEGNAMENTI DI GIOVANNI PAOLO
II,) III, 1 (1980), 472-476.
[9] Cf. Second Vatican Council, GAUDIUM ET SPES, 4.
[10] Cf. Cf. Second Vatican Council, LUMEN GENTIUM, 12.
[11] Cf. 1 Jn. 2:20.
[12] Second Vatican Council, LUMEN GENTIUM, 35.
[13] Cf. Second Vatican Council, LUMEN GENTIUM, 12; Congregation for the
Doctrine of the Faith, Declaration MYSTERIUM ECCLESIAE, 2: AAS 65 (1973),
398-400.
[14] Cf. Second Vatican Council, LUMEN GENTIUM, 12; DEI VERBUM, 10.
[15] Cf. John Paul II, Homily for the Opening of the Sixth Synod of Bishops,
3.
[16] Cf. St. Augustine, DE CIVITATE DEI, XIV, 28; CSEL 40, II, 56- 57.
[17] GAUDIUM ET SPES, 15.
[18] Cf. Eph. 3:8; Second Vatican Council, GAUDIUM ET SPES, 44; AD GENTES,
15, 22.
[19] Cf. Mt. 19:4-6.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
PART TWO THE PLAN OF GOD FOR MARRIAGE AND THE FAMILY
11. Man, the Image of the God Who Is Love. ------------------------------------------
God created man in his own image and likeness [20]; calling him to existence
through love, he called him at the same time for love.
God is love [21] and in himself he lives a mystery of personal loving
communion. Creating the human race in his own image and continually keeping
it in being, God inscribed in the humanity of man and woman the vocation,
and thus the capacity and responsibility, of love and communion [22].
Love is therefore the fundamental and innate vocation of every human being.
As an incarnate spirit, that is, a soul which expresses itself in a body
and a body informed by an immortal spirit, man is called to love in his
unified totality. Love includes the human body, and the body is made a
sharer in spiritual love.
Christian revelation recognizes two specific ways of realizing the vocation
of the human person, in its entirety, to love: marriage and virginity
or celibacy. Either one is in its proper form an actuation of the most
profound truth of man, of his being "created in the image of God."
Consequently sexuality, by means of which man and woman give themselves
to one another through the acts which are proper and exclusive to spouses,
is by no means something purely biological, but concerns the innermost
being of the human person as such. It is realized in a truly human way
only if it is an integral pert of the love by which a man and a woman
commit themselves totally to one another until death. The total physical
self-giving would be a lie if it were not the sign and fruit of a total
personal self- giving, in which the whole person, including the temporal
dimension, is present: If the person were to withhold something or reserve
the possibility of deciding otherwise in the future, by this very fact
he or she would not be giving totally.
This totality which is required by conjugal love also corresponds to the
demands of responsible fertility. This fertility is directed to the generation
of a human being, and so by its nature it surpasses the purely biological
order and involves a whole series of personal values. For the harmonious
growth of these values a persevering and unified contribution by both
parents is necessary.
The only "place" in which this self-giving in its whole truth
is made possible is marriage, the covenant of conjugal love freely and
consciously chosen, whereby man and woman accept the intimate community
of life and love willed by God himself [23], which only in this light
manifests its true meaning. The institution of marriage is not an undue
interference by society or authority, nor the extrinsic imposition of
a form. Rather, it is an interior requirement of the covenant of conjugal
love which is publicly affirmed as unique and exclusive in order to live
in complete fidelity to the plan of God, the creator. A person's freedom,
far from being restricted by this fidelity, is secured against every form
of subjectivism or relativism and is made a sharer in creative wisdom.
12. Marriage and Communion Between God and People. --------------------------------------------------
The communion of love between God and people, a fundamental part of the
revelation and faith experience of Israel, finds a meaningful expression
in the marriage covenant which is established between a man and a woman.
For this reason the central word of revelation, "God loves his people,"
is likewise proclaimed through the living and concrete word whereby a
man and a woman express their conjugal love. Their bond of love becomes
the image and the symbol of the covenant which unites god and his people
[24]. And the same sin which can harm the conjugal covenant becomes an
image of the infidelity of the people to their God: Idolatry is prostitution
[25], infidelity is adultery, disobedience to the law is abandonment of
the spousal love of the Lord. But the infidelity of israel does not destroy
the eternal fidelity of the Lord, and therefore the ever faithful love
of God is put forward as the model of the relations of the faithful love
which should exist between spouses [26].
13. Jesus Christ, Bridegroom of the Church, and the Sacrament of ----------------------------------------------------------------
Matrimony. ----------
The communion between God and his people finds its definitive fulfillment
in Jesus Christ, the bridegroom who loves and gives himself as the savior
of humanity, uniting it to himself as his body.
He reveals the original truth of marriage, the truth of the "beginning"
[27], and, freeing man from his hardness of heart, he makes man capable
of realizing this truth in its entirety.
This revelation reaches its definitive fullness in the gift of love which
the word of God makes to humanity in assuming a human nature, and in the
sacrifice which Jesus Christ makes of himself on the cross for his bride,
the church. In this sacrifice there is entirely revealed that plan which
God has imprinted on the humanity of man and woman since their creation
[28], the marriage of baptized persons thus becomes a real symbol of that
new and eternal covenant sanctioned in the blood of Christ. The Spirit
which the Lord pours forth gives a new heart, and renders man and woman
capable of loving one another as Christ has loved us. Conjugal love reaches
that fullness to which it is interiorly ordained, conjugal charity, which
is the proper and specific way in which the spouses participate in and
are called to live the very charity of Christ, who gave himself on the
cross.
In a deservedly famous page, Tertullian has well expressed the greatness
of this conjugal life in Christ and its beauty: "How can I ever express
the happiness of the marriage that is joined together by the church, strengthened
by an offering, sealed by a blessing, announced by angels and ratified
by the Father? !!! How wonderful the bond between two believers, with
a single hope, a single desire, a single observance, a single service!
They are both brethren and both fellow servants; there is no separation
between them in spirit or flesh. In fact they are truly two in one flesh,
and where the flesh is one, one is the spirit" [29].
Receiving and mediating faithfully on the word of God, the church has
solemnly taught and continued to teach that the marriage of the baptized
is one of the seven sacraments of the new covenant [30].
Indeed by means of baptism, man and woman are definitively placed within
the new and eternal covenant, in the spousal covenant of Christ with the
church. And it is because of this indestructible insertion that the intimate
community of conjugal life and love, founded by the creator [31], is elevated
and assumed into the spousal charity of Christ, sustained and enriched
by his redeeming power.
By virtue of the sacraments of their marriage, spouses are bound to one
another in the most profoundly indissoluble manner. Their belonging to
each other is the real representation, by means of the sacramental sign,
of the very relationship of Christ with the church.
Spouses are therefore the permanent reminder to the church of what happened
on the cross; they are for one another and for the children witnesses
to the salvation in which the sacrament makes them sharers. Of this salvation
event marriage, like every sacrament, is a memorial, actuation and prophecy:
"As a memorial, the sacrament gives them the grace and duty of commemorating
the great works of God and of bearing witness to them before their children.
As actuation, it gives them the grace and duty of putting into practice
in the present, toward each other and their children, the demands of a
love which forgives and redeems. As prophecy, it gives them the grace
and duty of living and bearing witness to the hope of the future encounter
with Christ" [32].
Like each one of the seven sacraments, so also marriage is a real symbol
of the event of salvation, but in its own way.
"The spouses participate in it as spouses, together, as a couple,
so that the first and immediate effect of marriage (res et sacramentum)
is not supernatural grace itself, but the Christian conjugal bond, a typically
Christian communion of two persons because it represents the mystery of
Christ's incarnation and the mystery of his covenant. The content of participation
in Christ's life is also specific: Conjugal love involves a totality,
in which all the elements of the person enter -- appeal of the body and
instinct, power of feeling and affectivity, aspiration of the spirit and
of will. It aims at a deeply personal unity, the unity that, beyond union
in one flesh, leads to forming one heart and soul; it demands indissolubility
and faithfulness in definitive mutual giving; and is open to fertility
(cf. Humanae Vitae, 9). In a word, it is a question of the normal characteristics
of all natural conjugal love, but with a new significance which not only
purifies and strengthens them, but raises them to the extent of making
them the expression of specifically Christian values" [33].
14. Children, the Precious Gift of Marriage. --------------------------------------------
According to the plan of God, marriage is the foundation of the wider
community of the family, since the very institution of marriage and conjugal
love is ordained to the procreation and education of children, in whom
it finds its crowning [34].
In its most profound reality, love is essentially a gift; and conjugal
love, while leading the spouses to the reciprocal "knowledge"
which makes them "one flesh", [35] does not end with the couple,
because it makes them capable of the greatest possible gift, the gift
by which they become cooperators with God for giving life to a new human
person. Thus the couple, while giving themselves to one another, give
not just themselves but also the reality of children, who are a living
reflection of their love, a permanent sign of conjugal unity and a living
and inseparable synthesis of their being a father and a mother.
When they become parents, spouses receive from God the gift of a new responsibility.
Their parental love is called to become for the children the visible sign
of the very love of God, "from whom every family in heaven and on
earth is named" [36].
It must not be forgotten however, that even when procreation is not possible,
conjugal life does not for this reason lose its value. Physical sterility
in fact, can be for the spouses the occasion for other important services
to the life of the human person, for example, adoption, various forms
of educational work, and assistance to other families and to poor or handicapped
children.
15. The Family, a Communion of Persons. ---------------------------------------
In matrimony and in the family a complex of interpersonal relationships
is set up -- married life, fatherhood and motherhood, filiation and fraternity
-- through which each human person is introduced into the "human
family" and into the "family of God," which is the church.
Christian marriage and the Christian family build up the church: for in
the family the human person is not only brought into being and progressively
introduced by means of education into the human community, but by means
of rebirth of baptism and education in the faith the child is also introduced
into God's family, which is the church.
The human family, disunited by sin, is reconstituted in its unity by the
redemptive power of death and resurrection of Christ [37]. Christian marriage,
by participating in the salvific efficacy of this event, constitutes the
natural setting in which the human person is introduced into the great
family of the church.
The commandment to grown and multiply, given to man and woman in the beginning,
in this way reaches its whole truth and full realization.
The church thus finds in the family, born from the sacrament, the cradle
and the setting in which she can enter the human generations and where
these in turn can enter the church.
16. Marriage and Virginity or Celibacy. ---------------------------------------
Virginity or celibacy for the sake of the kingdom of God not only does
not contradict the dignity of marriage but presupposes it and confirms
it. Marriage and virginity or celibacy are two ways of expressing and
living the one mystery of the covenant of God with his people. When marriage
is not esteemed, neither can consecrated virginity or celibacy exist;
when human sexuality is not regarded as a great value given by the creator,
the renunciation of it for the sake of the kingdom of heaven loses its
meaning.
Rightly indeed does St. John Chrysostom say:
"Whoever denigrates marriage also diminishes the glory of virginity.
Whoever praises it makes virginity more admirable and resplendent. What
appears good only in comparison with evil would not be particularly good.
It is something better than what is admitted to be good that is the most
excellent good" [38].
In virginity or celibacy, the human being is awaiting, also in a bodily
way, the eschatological marriage of Christ with the church, giving himself
or herself completely to the church in the hope that Christ may give himself
to the church in the full truth of eternal life. The celibate person thus
anticipates in his or her flesh the new world of the future resurrection
[39].
By virtue of this witness, virginity or celibacy keeps alive in the church
a consciousness of the mystery of marriage and defends it from any reduction
and impoverishment.
Virginity or celibacy, by liberating the human heart in a unique way [40],
"so as to make it burn with greater love for God and all humanity"
[41], bears witness that the kingdom of God and his justice is that pearl
of great price which is preferred to every other value no matter how great,
and hence must be sought as the only definitive value. It is for this
reason that the church throughout her history has always defended the
superiority of this charism to that of marriage, by reason of the wholly
singular link which it has with the kingdom of God [42].
In spite of having renounced physical fecundity, the celibate person becomes
spiritually fruitful, the father and mother of many, cooperating in the
realization of the family according to God's plan.
Christian couples therefore have the right to expect from celibate persons
a good example and a witness of fidelity to their vocation until death.
Just as fidelity at times becomes difficult for married people and requires
sacrifice, mortification and self- denial, the same can happen to celibate
persons, and their fidelity, even in the trials that may occur, should
strengthen the fidelity of married couples [43].
These reflections on virginity or celibacy can enlighten and help those
who, for reasons independent of their own will, have been unable to marry
and have then accepted their situation in a spirit of service.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Footnotes:
[20] Cf. Gn. 1:26-27.
[21] Cf. 1 Jn. 4:8.
[22] Cf. Second Vatican Council, GAUDIUM ET SPES, 12.
[23] Cf. Ibid, 48.
[24] Cf. e.g., Hos. 2:21; Jer. 3:6-13; Is. 54.
[25] Ez. 16:25.
[26] Cf. Hos. 3.
[27] Cf. G. 2:24; Mt. 19:5.
[28] Cf. Eph. 5:32-33.
[29] Tertullian, AD UXOREM, II, VIII, 6-8: CCL, I, 393.
[30] Cf. Council of Trent, Session XXIV, Canon 1:I.D. Mansi, SACRORUM
CONCILIORUM NOVA ET EMPLISSIMA COLLECTIO, 33, 149-150.
[31] Cf. Second Vatican Council, GUADIUM ET SPES, 48.
[32] John Paul II, Address to the delegates of the Centre de Liaison des
Equipes de Recherche ( Nov. 3, 1979), 3: INSEGNAMENTI II, 2 (1979), 1038.
[33] Ibid, 4; loc. cit., 1032.
[34] Cf. Second Vatican Council, GAUDIUM ET SPES, 50.
[35] St. John Chrysostom, VIRGINITY, X: PG 48: 540.
[39] Cf. Mt. 22:30.
[40] Cf. 1 Cor. 7:32-35.
[41] Second Vatican Council, PERFECTAE CARITATIS, 12.
[42] Cf. Pius XII, Encyclical SACRA VIRGINITAS, II: AAS 46 (1954), 174ff.
[43] Cf. John Paul II, Letter NOVO INCPIENTE (April 8, 1979), 9: AAS 71
(1979), 410-411.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
PART THREE THE ROLE OF THE CHRISTIAN FAMILY
17. Family, Become What You Are. --------------------------------
The family finds in the plan of God the creator and redeemer not only
its identity, what it is, but also its mission, what it can and should
do. The role that God calls the family to perform in history derives from
what the family is: its role represents the dynamic and existential development
of what it is. Each family finds within itself a summons that cannot be
ignored and that specifies both its dignity and its responsibility: Family
become what you are.
Accordingly, the family must go back to the "beginning" of God's
creative act if it is to attain self-knowledge and self-realization in
accordance with the inner truth not only of what it is, but also of what
it does in history. And since in God's plan it has been established as
an "intimate community of live and love" [44], the family has
the mission to become more and more what it is, that is to say, a community
of life and love in an effort that will find fulfillment, as will everything
created and redeemed, in the kingdom of God. Looking at it in such a way
as to reach its very roots, we must say that the essence and role of the
family are in the final analysis specified by love. Hence the family has
the mission to guard, reveal and communicate love, and this is a living
reflection of and a real sharing in God's love for humanity and the love
of Christ the Lord for the church, his bride.
Every particular task of the family is an expression and concrete actuation
of that fundamental mission. We must therefore go deeper into the unique
riches of the family's mission and probe its contents, which are both
manifold and unified.
Thus, with love as its point of departure and making constant reference
to it, the recent synod emphasized four general tasks for the family:
I. Forming a community of persons; II. Serving life; III. Participating
in the development of society; IV. Sharing in the life and mission of
the church.
I. FORMING A COMMUNITY OF PERSONS. ----------------------------------
18. Love as the principle and power of communion. -------------------------------------------------
The family, which is founded and given life by love, is a community of
persons: of husband and wife, of parents and children, of relatives. Its
first task is to live with fidelity the reality of communion in a constant
effort to develop an authentic community of persons.
The inner principle of that task, its permanent power and its final goal,
is love: Without love the family is not a community of persons, and in
the same way, without love the family cannot live, grow and perfect itself
as a community of persons. What I wrote in the Encyclical REDEMPTOR HOMINIS
applies primarily and especially within the family as such: "Man
cannot live without love. He remains a being that is incomprehensible
for himself, his life is senseless, if love is not revealed to him, if
he does not encounter love, if he does not experience it and make it his
own, if he does not participate intimately in it" [45].
The love between husband and wife and, in a derivatory and broader way,
the love between members of the same family -- between parents and children,
brothers and sisters and relatives and members of the household -- is
given life and sustenance by the unceasing inner dynamism leading the
family to ever deeper and more intense communion, which is the foundation
and soul of the community of marriage and the family.
19. The indivisible unity of conjugal communion. ------------------------------------------------
The first communion is the one which is established and which develops
between husband and wife: By virtue of the covenant of married life, the
man and woman "are no longer two but one flesh" [46] and they
are called to grow continually in their communion through day-to-day fidelity
to their marriage promise of total mutual self-giving.
This conjugal communion sinks its roots in the natural complementarity
that exists between man and woman and is nurtured through the personal
willingness of the spouses to share their entire life project, what they
have and what they are: For this reason such communion is the fruit and
the sign of a profoundly human need. But in the Lord Christ God takes
up this human need, confirms it, purifies it and elevates it, leading
it to perfection through the sacrament of matrimony: the Holy Spirit who
is poured out in the sacramental celebration offers Christian couples
the gift of a new communion of love that is the living and real image
of that unique unity which makes of the church the indivisible mystical
body of the Lord Jesus.
The gift of the spirit is a commandment of life for Christian spouses
and at the same time a stimulating impulse so that every day they may
progress toward an ever richer union with each other on all levels --
of the body, of the character, of the heart, of the intelligence and will,
of the soul [47] -- revealing in this way to the church and to the world
the new communion of love, given by the grace of Christ.
Such a communion is radically contradicted by polygamy: This, in fact,
directly negates the plan of God which was revealed from the beginning,
because it is contrary to the equal personal dignity of men and women,
who in matrimony give themselves with a love that is total and therefore
unique and exclusive. As the Second Vatican Council writes: "Firmly
established by the Lord, the unity of marriage will radiate from the equal
personal dignity of husband and wife, a dignity acknowledged by mutual
and total love" [48].
20. An indissoluble communion. ------------------------------
Conjugal communion is characterized not only by its unity, but also by
its indissolubility: "As a mutual gift of two persons, this intimate
union, as well as the good of the children, imposes total fidelity on
the spouses and argues for an unbreakable oneness between them" [49].
It is a fundamental duty of the church to reaffirm strongly, as the synod
fathers did, the doctrine of the indissolubility of marriage. To all those
who in our times consider it too difficult or indeed impossible to be
bound to one person for the whole of life, and to those caught up in a
culture that rejects indissolubility of marriage and openly mocks the
commitment of spouses to fidelity, it is necessary to reconfirm the good
news of the definitive nature of that conjugal love that has in Christ
its foundation and strength [50].
Being rooted in the personal and total self-giving of the couple and being
required by the good of the children, the indissolubility of marriage
finds its ultimate truth in the plan that God has manifested in his revelation:
He wills and communicates the indissolubility of marriage as a fruit,
a sign and a requirement of the absolutely faithful love that God has
for man and that the Lord Jesus has for the church.
Christ renews the first plan that the creator inscribed in the hearts
of man and woman, and in the celebration of the sacrament of matrimony
offers "a new heart": thus the couples are not only able to
overcome "hardness of heart" [51], but also, and above all,
they are able to share the full and definitive love of Christ, the new
and eternal covenant made flesh. Just as the Lord Jesus is the "faithful
witness" [52], the "yes" of the promises of God [53] and
thus the supreme realization of the unconditional faithfulness with which
God loves his people, so Christian couples are called to participate truly
in the irrevocable indissolubility that binds Christ to the church, his
bride, loved by him to the end [54].
The gift of the sacrament is at the same time a vocation and commandment
for Christian spouses, that they may remain faithful to each other forever,
beyond every trial and difficulty, in generous obedience to the holy will
of the Lord: "What therefore God has joined together, let not man
put asunder" [55].
To bear witness to the inestimable value of the indissolubility and fidelity
of marriage is one of the most precious and most urgent tasks of Christian
couples in our time. So, with all my brothers who participated in the
Synod of Bishops, I praise and encourage those numerous couples who, though
encountering no small difficulty, preserve and develop the value of indissolubility:
Thus in a humble and courageous manner they perform the role committed
to them of being in the world a "sign" -- a small and precious
sign, sometimes also subjected to temptation, but always renewed -- of
the unfailing fidelity with which God and Jesus Christ love each and every
human being. But it is also proper to recognize the value of the witness
of those spouses who, even when abandoned by their partner, with the strength
of faith give an authentic witness to fidelity, of which the world today
has a great need. For this reason they must be encouraged and helped by
the pastors and the faithful of the church.
21. The broader communion of the family. ----------------------------------------
Conjugal communion constitutes the foundation on which is built the broader
communion of family, of parents and children, of brothers and sisters
with each other, of relatives and other members of the household.
This communion is rooted in the natural bonds of flesh and blood and grows
to its specifically human perfection with the establishment and maturing
of the still deeper and richer bonds of the spirit: The love that animates
the interpersonal relationships of the different members of the family
constitutes the interior strength that shapes and animates the family
communion and community.
The Christian family is also called to experience a new and original communion
which confirms and perfects natural and human communion. In fact the grace
of Jesus Christ, "the firstborn among many brethren" [56], is
by its nature and interior dynamism "a grace of brotherhood,"
as St. Thomas Aquinas calls it [57]. The Holy Spirit, who is poured forth
in the celebration of the sacraments, is the living source and inexhaustible
sustenance of the supernatural communion that gathers believers and links
them with Christ and with each other in the unity of the church of God.
The Christian family constitutes a specific revelation and realization
of ecclesial communion, and for this reason too it can and should be called
"the domestic church" [58].
All members of the family, each according to his or her own gift, have
the grace and responsibility of guiding day by day the communion of persons,
making the family "a school of deeper humanity" [59]: This happens
where there is care and love for the little ones, the sick, the aged,
where there is mutual service every day; when there is a sharing of goods,
of joys and of sorrows.
A fundamental opportunity for building such a communion is constituted
by the educational exchange between parents and children [60], in which
each gives and receives. By means of love, respect and obedience toward
their parents, children offer their specific and irreplaceable contribution
to the construction of an authentically human and Christian family [61].
They will be aided in this if parents exercise their unrenounceable authority
as a true and proper "ministry", that is, as a service to the
human and Christian well-being of their children and in particular as
a service aimed at helping them acquire a truly responsible freedom, and
if parents maintain a living awareness of the "gift" they continually
receive from their children.
Family communion can only be preserved and perfected through a great spirit
of sacrifice. It requires, in fact, a ready and generous openness of each
and all to understanding, to forbearance, to pardon, to reconciliation.
There is no family that does not know how selfishness, discord, tension
and conflict violently attack and at times mortally wound its own communion:
Hence there arise the many and varied forms of division in family life.
But, at the same time, every family is called by the God of peace to have
the joyous and renewing experience of "reconciliation", that
is, communion re-established, unity restored. In particular, participation
in the sacrament of reconciliation and in the banquet of the one body
of Christ offers to the Christian family the grace and the responsibility
of overcoming every division and of moving toward the fullness of communion
willed by God, responding in this way to the ardent desire of the Lord:
"that they may be one" [62].
22. The rights and role of women. ---------------------------------
In that it is, and ought to become, a communion and community of persons,
the family finds in love the source and the constant impetus for welcoming,
respecting and promoting each one of its members in his or her lofty dignity
as a person, that is, as a living image of God. As the synod fathers rightly
stated, the moral criterion for the authenticity of conjugal and family
relationships consists in fostering the dignity and vocation of the individual
persons, who achieve their fullness by sincere self- giving [63].
In this perspective the synod devoted special attention to women, to their
rights and role within the family and society. In the same perspective
are also to be considered men as husbands and fathers, and likewise children
and the elderly.
Above all it is important to underline the equal dignity and responsibility
of women with men. This equality is realized in a unique manner in that
reciprocal self-giving by each one to the other and by both to the children
which is proper to marriage and the family. What human reason intuitively
perceives and acknowledges is fully revealed by the word of God: The history
of salvation, in fact, is a continuous and luminous testimony to the dignity
of women.
In creating the human race "male and female" [64], God gives
man and woman an equal personal dignity, endowing them the inalienable
rights and responsibilities proper to the human person. God then manifests
the dignity of women in the highest form possible, by assuming human flesh
from the Virgin Mary, whom the church honors as the mother of God, calling
her the new Eve and presenting her as the model of redeemed woman. The
sensitive respect of Jesus toward the women that he called to his following
and his friendship, his appearing on Easter morning to a woman before
the other disciples, the mission entrusted to women to carry the good
news of the resurrection to the apostles -- these are all signs that confirm
the special esteem of the Lord Jesus for women. The apostle Paul will
say: "IN Christ Jesus you are all children of God through faith ...
There is neither slave nor free, there is neither male nor female; for
you are all one in Christ Jesus" [65].
23. Women and society. ----------------------
Without intending to deal with all the various aspects of the vast and
complex theme of the relationships between women and society and limiting
these remarks to a few essential points, one cannot but observe that in
the specific area of family life a widespread social and cultural tradition
has considered women's role to be exclusively that of wife and mother,
without adequate access to public functions, which have generally been
reserved for men.
There is no doubt that the equal dignity and responsibility of men and
women fully justifies women's access to public functions. On the other
hand the true advancement of women requires that clear recognition be
given to the value of their maternal and family role, by comparison with
all other public roles and all other professions. Furthermore, these roles
and professions should be harmoniously combined if we wish the evolution
of society and culture to be truly and fully human.
This will come about more easily if, in accordance with the wishes expressed
by the synod, a renewed "theology of work" can shed light upon
and study in depth the meaning of work in the Christian life and determine
the fundamental bond between work and the family, and therefore the original
and irreplaceable meaning of work in the home be recognized and respected
by all in its irreplaceable value.
This is of particular importance in education: For possible discrimination
between the different types of work and professions is eliminated at its
very root once it is clear that all people in every area are working with
equal rights and equal responsibilities. The image of God in man and in
woman will thus be seen with added luster.
While it must be recognized that women have the same right as men to perform
various public functions, society must be structured in such a way that
wives and mothers are not in practice compelled to work outside the home,
and that their families can live and prosper in a dignified way even when
they themselves devote their full time to their own family.
Furthermore, the mentality which honors women more for their work outside
the home than for their work within the family must be overcome. This
requires that men should truly esteem and love women with total respect
for their personal dignity, and that society should create and develop
conditions favoring work in the home.
With due respect to the different vocations of men and women, the church
must in her own life promote as far as possible the equality of rights
and dignity: and this for the good of all, the family, the church, and
society.
But clearly all of this does not mean for women a renunciation of their
femininity or an imitation of the male role, but the fullness of true
feminine humanity which should be expressed in their activity, whether
in the family or outside it, without disregarding the differences of customs
and cultures in this sphere.
24. Offenses against women's dignity. -------------------------------------
Unfortunately the Christian message about the dignity of women is contradicted
by that persistent mentality which considers the human being not as a
person but as a thing, as an object of trade, at the service of selfish
interest and mere pleasure: The first victims of this mentality are women.
This mentality produces very bitter fruits, such as contempt for man and
for women, slavery, oppression of the weak, pornography, prostitution
-- especially in an organized form -- and all those various forms of discrimination
that exist in the fields of education, employment wages, etc.
Besides, many forms of degrading discrimination still persist today in
a great part of our society that affect and seriously harm particular
categories of women, as for example childless wives, widows, separated
or divorced women, and unmarried mothers.
The synod fathers deplored these and other forms of discrimination as
strongly as possible. I therefore ask that vigorous and incisive pastoral
action be taken by all to overcome them definitively so that the image
of God that shines in all human beings without exception may be fully
respected.
25. Men as husbands and fathers. --------------------------------
Within the conjugal and family communion-community, the man is called
upon to live his gift and role as husband and father.
In his wife he sees the fulfillment of God's intention: "It is not
good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fir for him"
[67], and he makes his own of the cry of Adam, the first husband: "This
at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh" [68].
Authentic conjugal love presupposes and requires that man have a profound
respect for the equal dignity of his wife: "You are not her master,"
writes St. Ambrose, "but her husband; she was not given to you to
be your slave, but your wife. ... Reciprocate her attentiveness to you
and be grateful to have her for her love" [69]. With his wife a man
should live "a very special form of personal friendship" [70].
As for the Christian, he is called upon to develop a new attitude of love,
manifesting toward his wife a charity that is both gentle and strong life
that which Christ has for the church.
Love for his wife as mother of their children and love for the children
themselves are for the man the natural way of understanding and fulfilling
his own fatherhood. Above all where social and cultural conditions so
easily encourage a father to be less concerned with his family or at any
rate less involved in the work of education, efforts must be made to restore
socially the conviction that the place and task of the father in and for
the family is of unique and irreplaceable importance [72]. As experience
teaches, the absence of a father causes psychological and moral imbalance
and notable difficulties in family relationships, as does, in contrary
circumstances, the oppressive presence of a father, especially where there
still prevails the phenomenon of "machismo," or a wrong superiority
of male prerogatives which humiliates women and inhibits the development
of healthy family relationships.
In revealing and in reliving on earth the very fatherhood of God [73],
a man is called upon to ensure the harmonious and united development of
all the members of the family: He will perform this task by exercising
generous responsibility for the life conceived under the heart of the
mother, by a more solitious commitment to education, a task he shares
with his wife [74], by work which is never a cause of division in the
family but promotes its unity and stability, and by means of the witness
he gives of an adult Christian life which effectively introduces the children
into the living experience of Christ and the church.
26. The rights of children. ---------------------------
In the family, which is a community of persons, special attention must
be devoted to the children by developing a profound esteem for their personal
dignity and a great respect and generous concern for their rights. This
is true of every child, but it becomes all the more urgent the smaller
the child is and the more it is in need of everything, when it is sick,
suffering or handicapped.
By fostering and exercising a tender and strong concern for every child
that comes into this world, the church fulfills a fundamental mission:
for she is called upon to reveal and put forward anew in history the example
and the commandment of Christ the Lord, who placed the child at the heart
of the kingdom of God: "Let the children come to me, and do not hinder
them, for to such belongs the kingdom of heaven" [75].
I repeat once again what I said to the General Assembly of the United
Nations Oct. 2, 1979:
"I wish to express the joy that we all find in children, the springtime
of life, the anticipation of the future history of each of our present
earthly homelands. No country on earth, no political system can think
of its own future otherwise than through the image of these new generations
that will receive from their parents the manifold heritage of values,
duties and aspirations of the nation to which they belong and of the whole
human family. Concern for the child, even before birth, from the first
moment of conception and then throughout the years of infancy and youth,
is the primary and fundamental test of the relationship of one human being
to another. And so, what better which can I express for every nation and
the whole of mankind, and for all the children of the world than a better
future in which respect for human rights will become a complete reality
throughout the third millennium which is drawing near" [76].
Acceptance, love esteem, many-sided and united material, emotional, educational
and spiritual concern for every child that comes into this world should
always constitute a distinctive, essential characteristic of all Christians,
in particular of the Christian family: Thus children while they are able
to grow "in wisdom and in stature, and in favor with God and man"
[77], offer their won precious contribution to building up the family
community and even to the sanctification of their parents [78].
27. The elderly in the family. ------------------------------
There are cultures which manifest a unique veneration and great love for
the elderly: Far from being outcasts from the family or merely tolerated
as a useless burden, they continue to be present and to take an active
and responsible part in family life, though having to respect the autonomy
of the new family, above all they carry out the important mission of being
a witness to the past and a source of wisdom for the young and for the
future.
Other cultures, however, especially in the wake of disordered industrial
and urban development, have both in the past and in the present set the
elderly aside in unacceptable ways. This causes acute suffering to them
and spiritually impoverishes many families.
The pastoral activity of the church must help everyone to discover and
to make good use of the role of the elderly within the civil and ecclesial
community, in particular within the family. In fact, "the life of
the aging helps to clarify a scale of human values; it shows the continuity
of generations and marvelously demonstrates the interdependence of God's
people. The elderly often have the charism to bridge generation gaps before
they are made. How many children have found understanding and love in
the eyes and words and caresses of the aging! And how many old people
have willingly subscribed to the inspired word that the 'crown of the
aged is their children's children' (Prv. 17:6)!" [79].
------------------------------------------------------------------- Footnotes:
[44] Second Vatican Council, GAUDIUM ET SPES, 48.
[45] Encyclical REDEMPTOR HOMINIS, 10: AAS 71 (1979), 274.
[46] Mt. 19:6; cf. Gn. 2:24.
[47] Cf. John Paul II, Letter NOVO INCIPIENTE (April 8, 1979), 9: AAS
71 (1979), 274.
[48] GAUDIUM ET SPES, 49; cf. JOHN PAUL II, Address at Kinshasa 4: loc
cit.
[49] Second Vatican Council, GAUDIUM ET SPES, 48.
[50] Cf. Eph. 5:25.
[51] Mt. 19:8.
[52] Rv. 3:14.
[53] Cf. 2 Cor. 1:20.
[54] Cf. Jn. 13:1.
[55] Mt. 19:6.
[56] Rom. 8:29.
[57] St. Thomas Aquinas, SUMMA THEOLOGIAE, II-II, q 14, art. 2, ad 4.
[58] Second Vatican Council, LUMEN GENTIUM, 11; cf. APOSTOLICAM ACTUSITATEM,
11.
[59] Second Vatican Council, GAUDIUM ET SPES, 52.
[60] Cf. Eph. 6:1-4.
[61] Cf. Second Vatican Council, GAUDIUM ET SPES, 48.
[62] Jn. 17:21.
[63] Cf. Second Vatican Council, GAUDIUM ET SPES, 24.
[64] Gn. 1:27.
[65] Gal. 3:26, 28.
[66] Cf. John Paul II, Encyclical LABOREM ECERCENS, 19: AAS 73 (1981),
625.
[67] Gn. 2:18.
[68] Gn. 2:23.
[69] St. Ambrose, EXAMERON, V 7, 19: CSEL 32, I, 154.
[70] Paul VI, Encyclical HUMANAE VITAE, 9: AAS 60 (1968), 486.
[71] Cf. Eph. 5:25.
[72] Cf. John Paul II, Address to the General Assembly of the United Nations
(Oct. 2, 1979), 21: AAS 71 (1979), 1159.
[73] Cf. Eph. 3:15.
[74] Cf. Second Vatican Council, GAUDIUM ET SPES, 52.
[75] Lk. 18:16; cf. Mt. 19:14; Mk. 18:16.
[76] John Paul II, Address to the General Assembly of the United Nations
(Oct. 2, 1979), 21: AAS 71 (1979), 1159.
[77] Lk. 2:52.
[78] Cf. Lk. 2:52.
[79] John Paul II, Address to the Participants in the International Forum
on Active Aging (Sept. 5, 1980), 5: INSEGNAMENTI, III (1980), 539.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
II. SERVING LIFE. -----------------
A. The Transmission of Life. ----------------------------
28. Cooperators in the love of God the Creator. -----------------------------------------------
With the creation of man and woman in his own image and likeness, God
crowns and brings to perfection the work of his hands: He calls them to
a special sharing in his love and his power as creator and Gather through
their free and responsible cooperation in transmitting the gift of human
life: "God blessed them, and God said to them, 'be fruitful and multiply,
and fill the earth and subdue it.'" [80].
Thus the fundamental task of the family is to serve life, to actualize
in history the original blessing of the creator -- that of transmitting
by procreation the divine image from person to person [81].
Fecundity is the fruit and the sign of conjugal love, the living testimony
of the full reciprocal self-giving of the spouses: "While not making
the other purposes of matrimony of less account, the true practice of
conjugal love, and the whole meaning of the family life which results
from it, have this aim: that the couple be ready with stout hearts to
cooperate with the love of the creator and the savior, who through them
will enlarge and enrich his own family day by day" [82].
However, the fruitfulness of conjugal love is not restricted solely to
the procreation of children, even understood in its specifically human
dimension: It is enlarged and enriched by all those fruits of moral, spiritual
and supernatural life which the father and mother are called to hand on
to their children, and through the children to the church and to the world.
29. The church's teaching and norm, always old yet always new. --------------------------------------------------------------
Precisely because the love of husband and wife is a unique participation
in the mystery of life and of the love of God himself, the church knows
that she has received the special mission of guarding and protecting the
lofty dignity of marriage and the most serious responsibility of the transmission
of human life.
Thus, in continuity with the living tradition of the ecclesial community
throughout history, the recent Second Vatican Council and the magisterium
of my predecessor Paul VI, expressed above all in the encyclical HUMANAE
VITAE, have handed on to our times a truly prophetic proclamation, which
reaffirms and reproposes with clarity the church's teaching and norm,
always old yet always new, regarding marriage and regarding the transmission
of human life.
For this reason the synod fathers made the following declaration at their
last assembly:
"This sacred synod, gathered together with the successor of Peter
in the unity of faith, firmly holds what has been set forth in the Second
Vatican Council (Cf. GAUDIUM ET SPES, 50) and afterward in the encyclical
HUMANAE VITAE, particularly that love between husband and wife must be
fully human, exclusive and open to new life (HUMANAE VITAE, 11: cf. 9,
12)" [83].
30. The church stands for life. -------------------------------
The teaching of the church in our day is placed in a social and cultural
context which renders it more difficult to understand and yet more urgent
and irreplaceable for promoting the true good of men and women.
Scientific and technological progress, which contemporary man is continually
expanding in his dominion over nature, not only offers the hope of creating
a new and better humanity, but also causes ever greater anxiety regarding
the future. Some ask themselves if it is a good thing to be alive or if
it would be better never to have been born; they doubt therefore if it
is right to bring others into life when perhaps they will curse their
existence in a cruel world with unforeseeable terrors. Others consider
themselves to be the only ones for whom the advantages of technology are
intended and they exclude others by imposing on them contraceptives or
even worse means. Still others imprisoned in a consumer mentality and
whose sole concern is to bring about a continual growth of material goods,
finish by ceasing to understand, and thus by refusing, the spiritual riches
of a new human life. The ultimate reason for these mentalities is the
absence in people's hearts of God, whose love alone is stronger than all
the world's fears and can conquer them.
Thus an anti-life mentality is born, as can be seen in many current issues:
One thinks, for example of a certain panic deriving from the studies of
ecologists and futurologists on population growth, which sometimes exaggerate
the danger of demographic increase to the quality of life.
But the church firmly believes that human life, even if weak and suffering,
is always a splendid gift of God's goodness. Against the pessimism and
selfishness which cast a shadow over the world, the church stands for
life: In each human life she sees the splendor of that "yes",
that "amen", who is Christ himself [84]. To the "no"
which assails and afflicts the world, she replies with this living "yes",
thus defending the human person and the world from all who plot against
and harm life.
The church is called upon to manifest anew to everyone, with clear and
stronger conviction, her will to promote human life by every means and
to defend it against all attacks in whatever condition or state of development
it is found.
Thus the church condemns as a grave offense against human dignity and
justice all those activities of governments or other public authorities
which attempt to limit in any way the freedom of couples in deciding about
children. Consequently any violence applied by such authorities in favor
of contraception or, still worse, of sterilization and procured abortion
must be altogether condemned and forcefully rejected. Likewise to be denounced
as gravely unjust are cases where in international relations economic
help given for the advancement of peoples is made conditional on programs
of contraception, sterilization and procured abortion [85].
31. That God's design may be ever more completely fulfilled. ------------------------------------------------------------
The church is certainly aware of the many complex problems which couples
in many countries face today in their task of transmitting life in a responsible
way. She also recognizes the serious problem of population growth in the
form it has taken in many parts of the world and its moral implications.
However, she holds that consideration in depth of all the aspects of these
problems offers a new and stronger confirmation of the importance of the
authentic teaching on birth regulation reproposed in the Second Vatican
Council and in the encyclical HUMANAE VITAE.
For this reason, together with the synod fathers I feel it is my duty
to extend a pressing invitation to theologians, asking them to unite their
efforts in order to collaborate with the hierarchial magisterium and to
commit themselves to the task of illustrating ever more clearly the biblical
foundations, the ethical grounds and the personalistic reasons behind
this doctrine. Thus it will be possible, in the context of an organic
exposition, to render the teaching of the church on this fundamental question
truly accessible to all people of good will, fostering a daily more enlightened
and profound understanding of it. In this way God's plan will be ever
more completely fulfilled for the salvation of humanity and for the glory
of the Creator.
A united effort by theologians in this regard, inspired by a convinced
adherence to the magisterium, which is the one authentic guide for the
people of God, is particularly urgent for reasons that include the close
link between Catholic teaching on this matter and the view of the human
person that the church proposes: Doubt or error in the field of marriage
or the family involves obscuring to a serious extent the integral truth
about the human person in a cultural situation that is already so often
confused and contradictory. In fulfillment of their specific role theologians
are called upon to provide enlightenment and a deeper understanding, and
their contribution is of incomparable value and represents a unique and
highly meritorious service to the family and humanity.
32. In an integral vision of the human person and of his or her ---------------------------------------------------------------
vocation. ---------
In the context of a culture which seriously distorts or entirely misinterprets
the true meaning of human sexuality because it separates it from its reference
to the person, the church more urgently feels how irreplaceable is her
mission of presenting sexuality as a value and task of the whole person,
created male and female in the image of God.
In this perspective the Second Vatican Council clearly affirmed that "when
there is a question of harmonizing conjugal love with the responsible
transmission of life, the moral aspect of any procedure does not depend
solely on sincere intentions or on an evaluation of motives. It must be
determined by objective standards. These, based on the nature of the human
person and his or her acts, preserve the full sense of mutual self-giving
and human procreation in the context of true love. Such a goal cannot
be achieved unless the virtue of conjugal chastity is sincerely practiced"
[86].
It is precisely by moving from "an integral vision of man and of
his vocation, not only his natural and earthly, but also his supernatural
and eternal vocation" [87], that Paul VI affirmed that the teaching
of the church "is founded upon the inseparable connection willed
by God and unable to be broken by man on his own initiative between the
two meanings of the conjugal act: the unitive meaning and the procreative
meaning" [88]. And he concluded by re-emphasizing that there must
be excluded as intrinsically immoral "every action which, either
in anticipation of the conjugal act, or in its accomplishment, or in the
development of its natural consequences, proposes, whether as an end or
as a means, to render procreation impossible" [89].
When couples, by means of recourse to contraception, separate these two
meanings that God the creator has inscribed in the being of man and woman
and in the dynamism of their sexual communion, they act as "arbiters"
of the divine plan and they "manipulate" and degrade human sexuality
and with it themselves and their married partner by altering its value
of "total" self-giving. Thus the innate language that expresses
the total reciprocal self-giving of husband and wife is overlaid, through
contraception, by an objectively contradictory language, namely, that
of not giving oneself totally to the other. This leads not only to a positive
refusal to be open to life, but also to a falsification of the inner truth
of conjugal love, which is called upon to give itself in personal totality.
When, instead, by means of recourse to periods of infertility, the couple
respect inseparable connection between the unitive and procreative meanings
of human sexuality, they are acting as "ministers" of God's
plan and they "benefit from" their sexuality according to the
original dynamism of "total" self-giving, without manipulation
or alteration [90].
In light of the experience of many couples and of the data provided by
the different human sciences, theological reflection is able to perceive
and is called to study further the difference, both anthropological and
moral, between contraception and recourse to the rhythm of the cycle:
It is a difference which is much wider and deeper than is usually thought,
one which involves in the final analysis two irreconcilable concepts of
the human person and of human sexuality. The choice of the natural rhythms
involves accepting the cycle of the person, that is, the woman, and thereby
accepting dialogue, reciprocal respect, shared responsibility and self-control.
To accept the cycle and to enter into dialogue means to recognize both
the spiritual and corporal character of conjugal communion and to live
personal love with its requirement of fidelity. In this context the couple
comes to experience how conjugal communion is enriched with those values
of tenderness and affection which constitute the inner soul of human sexuality
in its physical dimension also. In this way sexuality is respected and
promoted in its truly and fully human dimension and is never "used"
as an "object" that, by breaking the personal unity of soul
and body, strikes at God's creation itself at the level of the deepest
interaction of nature and person.
33. The church as teacher and mother for couples in difficulty. ---------------------------------------------------------------
In the field of conjugal morality the church is teacher and mother and
acts as such.
As teacher, she never tires of proclaiming the moral norm that must guide
the responsible transmission of life. The church is in no way the author
or arbiter of this norm. In obedience to the truth which is Christ, whose
image is reflected in the nature and dignity of the human person, the
church interprets the moral norm and proposes it to all people of good
will without concealing its demands of radicalness and perfection.
As mother, the church is close to the married couples who find themselves
in difficulty over this important point of the moral life: She knows well
their situation, which is often very arduous and at times truly tormented
by difficulties of every kind, not only individual difficulties but social
ones as well; she knows that many couples encounter difficulties not only
in the concrete fulfillment of the moral norm but even in understanding
its inherent values.
But it is one and the same church that is both teacher and mother. And
so the church never ceases to exhort and encourage all to resolve whatever
conjugal difficulties may arise without ever falsifying or compromising
the truth: She is convinced that there can be no true contradiction between
divine law on transmitting life and that on fostering authentic married
love [91]. Accordingly, the concrete pedagogy of the church must always
remain linked with her doctrine and never be separated from it. With the
same conviction as my predecessor, I therefore repeat: "To diminish
in no way the saving teaching of Christ constitutes an eminent form of
charity for souls" [92].
On the other hand, authentic ecclesial pedagogy displays its realism and
wisdom only by making a tenacious and courageous effort to create and
uphold all human conditions -- psychological, moral and spiritual -- indispensable
for understanding and living the moral value and norm.
There is no doubt that these conditions must include persistence and patience,
humility and strength of mind, filial trust in God and in his grace, and
frequent recourse to prayer and to the sacraments of the eucharist and
of reconciliation [93]. Thus strengthened, Christian husbands and wives
will be able to keep alive their awareness of the unique influence that
the grace of the sacrament of marriage has on every aspect of married
life including, therefore, their sexuality: The gift of the Spirit, accepted
and responded to by the husband and wife, helps them to live their human
sexuality in accordance with God's plan and as a sign of the unitive and
fruitful love of Christ for his church.
But the necessary conditions also include knowledge of the bodily aspect
and the body's rhythms of fertility. Accordingly, every effort must be
made to render such knowledge accessible to all married people and also
to young adults before marriage through clear, timely and serious instruction
and education given by married couples, doctors and experts. Knowledge
must then lead to education in self-control: Hence the absolute necessity
for the virtue of chastity and for permanent education in it. In the Christian
view, chastity by no means signifies rejection of human sexuality or the
lack of esteem for it: Rather it signifies spiritual energy capable of
defending love from the perils of selfishness and aggressiveness, and
able to advance it toward its full realization.
With deeply wise and loving intuition, Paul VI, was only voicing the experience
of many married couples when he wrote in his encyclical: To dominate instinct
by means of one's reason and free will undoubtably requires ascetical
practices, so that the affective manifestations of conjugal life may observe
the correct order, in particular with regard to the observance of periodic
continence. Yet this discipline which is proper to the purity of married
couples, far from harming conjugal love, rather confers it to a higher
human value. It demands continual effort, yet thanks to its beneficent
influence husband and wife fully develop their personalities, being enriched
with spiritual values. Such discipline bestows upon family life fruits
of serenity and peace,. and facilitates the solution of other problems;
it favors attention for one's partner, helps both parties to drive out
selfishness, the enemy of true love, and deepens their sense of responsibility.
By its means, parents acquire the capacity of having a deeper and more
efficacious influence on the education of their offspring" [94].
34. The moral progress of married people. -----------------------------------------
It is always very important to have a right notion of the moral order,
its values and its norms; and the importance is all the greater when the
difficulties in the way or respecting them become more numerous and serious.
Since the moral order reveals and sets forth the plan of God the creator,
for this very reason it cannot be something that harms man, something
impersonal. On the contrary, by responding to the deepest demands of the
human being created by God, it places itself at the service of that person's
full humanity with the delicate and binding love whereby God himself inspires,
sustains and guides every creature toward its happiness.
But man, who has been called to live God's wise and loving design in a
responsible manner, is an historical being who day by day builds himself
up through his many free decisions; and so he knows, loves and accomplishes
moral good by stages of growth.
Married people too are called upon to progress unceasingly in their moral
life with the support of a sincere and active desire to gain ever better
knowledge of the values enshrined in and fostered by the law of God. They
must also be supported by an upright and generous willingness to embody
these values in their concrete decisions. They cannot, however, look on
the law as merely an ideal to be achieved in the future: They must consider
it as a command of Christ the Lord to overcome difficulties with constancy.
"And so what is know as 'the law of gradualness' or step-by-step
advance cannot be identified with 'gradualness of the law,' as if there
were different degrees or forms of precept in God's law for different
individuals and situations. In God's plan, all husbands and wives are
called in marriage to holiness, and this lofty vocation is fulfilled to
the extent that the human person is able to respond to God's command with
serene confidence in God's grace and in his or her own will" [95].
On the same lines, it is part of the church's pedagogy that husbands and
wives would first recognize clearly the teaching of HUMANAE VITAE as indicating
the norm for the exercise of their sexuality, and that they should endeavor
to establish the conditions necessary for observing that norm. As the
synod noted, this pedagogy embraces the whole of married life. Accordingly,
the function of transmitting life must be integrated into the overall
mission of Christian life as a whole which, without the cross, cannot
reach the resurrection. In such a context it is understandable that sacrifice
cannot be removed from family life, but must in fact be wholeheartedly
accepted if the love between husband and wife is to be deepened and become
a source of intimate joy.
This shared progress demands reflection, instruction and suitable education
on the part of the priests, religious and lay people engaged in family
pastoral work: they will all be able to assist married people in their
human and spiritual progress, a progress that demands awareness of sin,
a sincere commitment to observe the moral law and the ministry of reconciliation.
It must also be kept in mind that conjugal intimacy involves the wills
of two persons, who are thereby called to harmonize their mentality and
behavior, requiring much patience, understanding and time. Uniquely important
in this field is unity of moral and pastoral judgement by priests -- a
unity that must be carefully sought and ensured in order that the faithful
may not have to suffer anxiety of conscience [96].
It will be easier for married people to make progress if, with respect
for the church's teaching and with trust in the grace of Christ, and with
the help and support of the pastors of souls and the entire ecclesial
community, they are able to discover and experience the liberating and
inspiring value of authentic love that is offered by the Gospel and set
before us by the Lord's commandment.
35. Instilling conviction and offering practical help. ------------------------------------------------------
With regard to the question of lawful birth regulation, the ecclesial
community at the present time must take on the task of instilling conviction
and offering practical help to those who wish to live out their parenthood
in a truly responsible way.
In this matter, while the church notes with satisfaction the results achieved
by scientific research aimed at more precise knowledge of the rhythms
of women's fertility, and while it encourages a more decisive and wide-ranging
extension of that research, it cannot fail to call with renewed vigor
on the responsibility of all -- doctors, experts, marriage counselors,
teachers and married couples -- who can actually help married people to
live their love with respect for the structure and finalities of the conjugal
act which expresses that love. This implies a broader, more decisive and
more systematic effort to make the natural methods of regulating fertility
known, respected and applied [97].
A very valuable witness can and should be given by those husbands and
wives who, through their joint exercise of periodic continence, have reached
a more mature personal responsibility with regard to love and life. As
Paul VI wrote: "To them the Lord entrusts the task of making visible
to people the holiness and sweetness of the law which unites the mutual
love of husband and wife with their cooperation with the love of God the
author of human life" [98].
------------------------------------------------------------------- Footnotes:
[80] Gn. 1:28.
[81] Cf. Gn. 5:1-3.
[82] Second Vatican Council, GAUDIUM ET SPES, 48.
[83] PROPOSITIO 21. Section 11 of the encyclical HUMANAE VITAE ends with
the statement: "The church, calling people back to the observance
of the norms of the natural law, as interpreted by her constant doctrine,
teaches that each and every marriage act must remain open to the transmission
of life (ut quilibet matrimonii usus ad vitam humanan procreandam per
se destinatus permaneat)": AAS 60 (1968), 488.
[84] Cf. 2 Cor. 1:19; Rv. 3:14.
[85] Cf. The sixth Synod of Bishops' Message to Christian Families in
the Modern World (Oct. 24, 1980), 5.
[86] GAUDIUM ET SPES, 51.
[87] Encyclical HUMANAE VITAE, 7: AAS 60 (1968), 485.
[88] Ibid., 12: loc cit. 488-489.
[89] Ibid., 14: loc cit. 490.
[90] Ibid., 13: loc cit.,m 489.
[91] Cf. Second Vatican Council, GAUDIUM ET SPES, 51.
[92] Encyclical HUMANAE VITAE, 29: AAS 60 (1968), 501.
[93] Cf. Ibid., 25: loc cit. 498-499.
[94] Ibid., 21: loc cit. 496.
[95] John Paul II, Homily at the Close of the Sixth Synod of Bishops (Oct.
25, 1980), 8: AAS 72 (1980), 1083.
[96] Cf. Paul VI, Encyclical HUMANAE VITAE, 28: AAS 60 (1968), 501.
[97] Cf. John Paul II, Address to the Delegates of the Centre de Liaison
des Equipes de Recherche (Nov. 3, 1979), 9: INSEGNAMENTI, II, 2 (1979),
1035; and cf. Address to the Participants in the First Congress for the
Family of Africa and Europe (Jan. 15, 1981):
[98] Encyclical HUMANAE VITAE, 25: AAS 60 (1968), 499.
------------------------------------------------------------------
B. Education. -------------
36. The right and duty of parents regarding education. ------------------------------------------------------
The task of giving education is rooted in the primary vocation of married
couples to participate in God's creative activity: By begetting in love
and for love a new person who has within himself or herself the vocation
for growth and development, parents by that very fact take the task of
helping that person effectively to live a fully human life. As the Second
Vatican Council recalled, "Since parents have conferred life on their
children, they have a most solemn obligation to educate their offspring.
Hence, parents must be acknowledged as the first and foremost educators
of their children. Their role as educators is so decisive that scarcely
anything can compensate for their failure in it. For it devolves on parents
to create a family atmosphere so animated with love and reverence for
God and others that a well-rounded personal and social development will
be fostered among the children. Hence, the family is the first school
of those social virtues which every society needs" [99].
The right and duty of parents to give education is essential, since it
is connected with the transmission of human life; it is original and primary
with regard to the educational role of others on account of the uniqueness
of the loving relationship between parents and children; and it is irreplaceable
and inalienable and therefore incapable of being entirely delegated to
others or usurped by others.
In addition to those characteristics, it cannot be forgotten that the
most basic element, so basic that it qualifies the educational role of
parents, is parental love, which finds fulfillment in the task of education
as it completes and perfects its service of life. As well as being a source,
the parents' love is also the animating principle and therefore the norm
inspiring and guiding all concrete educational activity, enriching it
with the values of kindness, constancy, goodness, service, disinterestedness
and self-sacrifice that are the most precious fruit of love.
37. Educating in the essential values of human life. ----------------------------------------------------
Even amid difficulties of the work of education, difficulties which are
often greater today, parents must trustingly and courageously train their
children in the essential values of human life. Children must grow up
with a correct attitude of freedom with regard to material goods, by adopting
a simple and austere lifestyle and being fully convinced that "man
is more precious for what he is than for what he has" [100].
In a society shaken and split by tensions and conflicts caused by the
violent clash of various kinds of individualism and selfishness, children
must be enriched not only with a sense of true justice, which alone leads
to respect for the personal dignity of each individual, but also and more
powerfully by a sense of true love, understood as sincere solicitude and
disinterested service with regard to others, especially the poorest and
those in most need. The family is the first and fundamental school of
social living: As a community of love, it finds in self-giving the law
that guides it and makes it grow. The self-giving that inspires the love
of husband and wife for each other is the model and norm for the self-giving
that must be practiced in the relationships between brothers and sisters
of the different generations living together in the family. And the communion
and sharing that are part of everyday life in the home at times of joy
and at times of difficulty are the most concrete and effective pedagogy
for the active, responsible and fruitful inclusion of the children in
the wider horizon of society.
Education in love as self-giving is also the indispensable premise for
parents called to give their children a clear and delicate sex education.
Faced with a culture that largely reduced human sexuality to the level
of something commonplace, since it interprets and lives it in a reductive
and impoverished way by linking it solely with the body and with selfish
pleasure, the educational service of parents must aim firmly at a training
in the area of sex that is truly and fully personal: for sexuality is
an enrichment of the whole person -- body, emotions and soul -- and it
manifests its inmost meaning in leading the person to the gift of self
in love.
Sex education, which is a basic right and duty of parents, must always
be carried out under their attentive guidance whether at home or in educational
centers chosen and controlled by them. In this regard, the church reaffirms
the law of subsidiarity, which the school is bound to observe when it
cooperates in sex education, by entering into the same spirit that animates
the parents.
In this context education for chastity is absolutely essential, for it
is a virtue that develops a person's authentic maturity and makes him
or her capable of respecting and fostering the "nuptial meaning"
of the body. Indeed Christian parents, discerning the signs of God's call,
will devote special attention and care to education in virginity or celibacy
as the supreme from of that self-giving that constitutes the very meaning
of human sexuality.
In view of the close links between the sexual dimension of the person
and his or her ethical values, education must bring the children to a
knowledge of and respect for the moral norms as the necessary and highly
valuable guarantee for responsible personal growth in human sexuality.
For this reason the church is firmly opposed to an often widespread form
of imparting sex information dissociated from moral principles. That would
merely be an introduction to the experience of pleasure and a stimulus
leading to the loss of serenity -- while still in the years of innocence
-- by opening the way to vice.
38. The mission to educate and the sacrament of marriage. ---------------------------------------------------------
For Christian parents the mission to educate, a mission rooted as we have
said in their participation in God's creating activity, has a new specific
source in the sacrament of marriage, which consecrates them for the strictly
Christian education of their children: that is to say, it calls upon them
to share in the very authority and love of God the Father and Christ the
shepherd, and in the motherly love of the church, and it enriches them
with wisdom, counsel, fortitude and all the other fits of the Holy Spirit
in order to help the children in their growth as human beings and as Christians.
The sacrament of marriage gives to the educational role the dignity and
vocation of being really and truly a "ministry" of the church
at the service of the building up of her members. So great and splendid
is the educational ministry of Christian parents that St. Thomas has no
hesitation in comparing it with the ministry of priests: "Some only
propagate and guard spiritual life by a spiritual ministry: This is the
role of the sacrament of orders, others do this for both corporal and
spiritual life, and this is brought about by the sacrament of marriage,
by which a man and a woman join in order to beget offspring and bring
them up to worship God" [101].
A vivid and attentive awareness of the mission that they have received
with the sacrament of marriage will help Christian parents to place themselves
at the service of the children's education with great serenity and trustfulness,
and also with a sense of responsibility before God, who calls them and
gives them the mission of building up the church in their children. Thus
in the case of baptized people, the family, called together by word and
sacrament as the church of the home, is both teacher and mother, the same
as the worldwide church.
39. First experience of the church. -----------------------------------
The mission to educate demands that Christian parents should present to
their children all the topics that are necessary for the gradual maturing
of their personality from a Christian and ecclesial point of view. They
will therefore follow the educational lines mentioned above, taking care
to show their children the depths of significance to which the faith and
love of Jesus Christ can lead. Furthermore, their awareness that the Lord
is entrusting to them the growth of a child of God, a brother or sister
of Christ, a temple of the Holy Spirit, a member of the church, will support
Christian parents in their task of strengthening the gift of divine grace
in their children's souls.
The Second Vatican Council describes the content of Christian education
as follows: "Such an education does not merely strive to foster maturity
... in the human person. Rather, its principal aims are these: that as
baptized persons are gradually introduced into a knowledge of the mystery
of salvation, they may daily grow more conscious of the gift of faith
which they have received; that they may learn to adore God the Father
in spirit and in truth (cf. Jn. 4:23), especially through liturgical worship;
that they may be trained to conduct their personal life in true righteousness
and holiness, according to their new nature (Eph. 4:22-24), and thus grow
to maturity, to the stature of the fullness of Christ (cf. Eph. 4:13),
and devote themselves to the upbuilding of the mystical body. Moreover,
aware of their calling, they should grow accustomed to giving witness
to the hope that is in them (cf. 1Pt. 3:15), and to promoting the Christian
transformation of the world" {102}.
The synod too, taking up and developing the indications of the council,
presented the educational mission of the Christian family as a true ministry
through which the Gospel is transmitted and radiated, so that family life
itself becomes an itinerary of faith and in some way a Christian initiation
and a school of following Christ. Within a family that is aware of this
gift, as Paul VI wrote, "all members evangelize and are evangelized"
[103].
By virtue of their ministry of educating, parents are through the witness
of their lives the first heralds of the Gospel for their children. Furthermore,
by praying with their children, by reading the word of God with them and
by introducing them deeply through Christian initiation into the body
of Christ -- both the eucharistic and the ecclesial body -- they become
fully parents, in that they are begetters not only of bodily life but
also of the life that through the Spirit's renewal flows from the cross
and resurrection of Christ.
In order that Christian parents may worthily carry out their ministry
of education, the synod fathers expressed the hope that a suitable catechism
for families would be prepared, one that would be clear, brief and easily
assimilated by all. The episcopal conferences were warmly invited to contribute
to producing this catechism.
40. Relations with other educating agents. ------------------------------------------
The family is the primary but not the only and exclusive educating community.
Man's community aspect itself -- both civil and ecclesial -- demands and
leads to a broader and more articulated activity resulting from well-ordered
collaboration between the various agents of education. All these agents
are necessary, even though each can and should play its part in accordance
with the special competence and contribution proper to itself [104].
The educational role of the Christian family therefore has a very important
place in the organic pastoral work. This involves a new form of cooperation
between parents and Christian communities and between the various educational
groups and pastors. In this sense, the renewal of the Catholic school
must give special attention both to the parents of the pupils and to the
formation of a perfect educating community.
The right of parents to choose an education in conformity with their religious
faith must be absolutely guaranteed.
The state and the church have the obligation to give families all possible
aid to enable them to perform their educational role properly. Therefore
both the church and the state must create and foster the institutions
and activities that families justly demand, and the aid must be in proportion
to the families' needs. However, those in society who are in charge of
schools must never forget that the parents have been appointed by God
himself as the first and principal educators of their children and that
their right is completely inalienable.
But corresponding to their right, parents have a serious duty to commit
themselves totally to a cordial and active relationship with the teachers
and school authorities.
If ideologies opposed to the Christian faith are taught in the schools,
the family must join other families, if possible through family associations,
and with all its strength and with wisdom help the young not to depart
from the faith. In this case the family needs special assistance from
pastors of souls, who must never forget that parents have the inviolable
right to entrust their children to the ecclesial community.
41. Manifold service to life. -----------------------------
Fruitful married life expresses itself in serving life in many ways. Of
these ways, begetting and educating children are the most immediate, specific
and irreplaceable. In fact, every act of true love toward a human being
bears witness to and perfects the spiritual fecundity of the family, since
it is an act of obedience to the deep inner dynamism of love as self-giving
to others.
For everyone this perspective is full of value and commitment, and it
can be an inspiration in particular for couples who experience physical
sterility.
Christian families, recognizing with faith all human beings as children
of the same heavenly Father, will respond generously to the children of
other families, giving them support and love not as outsiders but as members
of the one family of God's children. Christian parents will thus be able
to spread their love beyond the bonds of flesh and blood, nourishing the
links that are rooted in the spirit and that develop through concrete
service to the children of other families, who are often without even
the barest necessities.
Christian families will be able to show greater readiness to adopt and
foster children who have lost their parents or have been abandoned by
the. Rediscovering the warmth of affection of a family, these children
will be able to experience God's loving and provident fatherhood witnessed
to by Christian parents, and they will thus be able to grow up with serenity
and confidence in life. At the same time the whole family will be enriched
with the spiritual values of a wider fraternity.
Family fecundity must have an unceasing "creativity", a marvelous
fruit of the Spirit of God, who opens the eyes of the heart to discover
the new needs and sufferings of our society and gives courage for accepting
them and responding to them. A vast field of activity lies open to families:
Today even more preoccupying than child abandonment is the phenomenon
of social and cultural exclusion, which seriously affects the elderly,
the sick, the disabled, drug addicts, ex-prisoners, etc.
This broadens enormously the horizons of the parenthood of Christian families:
These and many other urgent needs of our time are a challenge to their
spiritually fruitful love. With families and through them, the Lord Jesus
continues to "have compassion" on the multitudes.
------------------------------------------------------------------- Footnotes:
[99] GRAVISSIUM EDUCATIONIS, 3.
[100] Second Vatican Council, GAUDIUM ET SPES, 35.
[101] St. Thomas Aquinas, SUMMA CONTRA GENTILES, IV, 58.
[102] GRAVISSIUM EDUCATIONIS, 2.
[103] Apostolic Exhortation EVANGELII NUNTIANDI, 71: AAS 68 (1976), 60-61.
[104] Cf. Second Vatican Council, GAUDIUM ET SPES, 3.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
III. PARTICIPATING IN THE DEVELOPMENT OF SOCIETY. -------------------------------------------------
42. The Family as the first and vital cell of society. ------------------------------------------------------
"Since the Creator of all things has established the conjugal partnership
as the beginning and basis of human society," the family is "the
first and vital cell of society" [105].
The family has vital and organic links with society since it is its foundation
and nourishes it continually through its role of service to life: It is
from the family that citizens come to birth and it is within the family
that they find the first school of the social virtues that are the animating
principle of the existence and development of society itself.
Thus, far from being closed in on itself, the family is by nature and
vocation open to other families and to society and undertakes its social
role.
43. Family life as an experience of communion and sharing. ----------------------------------------------------------
The very experience of communion and sharing that should characterize
the family's daily life represents its first and fundamental contribution
to society.
The relationships between the members of the family community are inspired
and guided by the law of "free giving." By respecting and fostering
personal dignity in each and every one as the only basis for value, this
free giving takes the form of heartfelt acceptance, encounter and dialogue,
disinterested availability, generous service and deep solidarity.
Thus the fostering of authentic and mature communion between persons within
the family is the first and irreplaceable school of social life, an example
and stimulus for the broader community of relationships marked by respect,
justice, dialogue and love.
The family is thus, as the synod fathers recalled, the place of origin
and the most effective means for humanizing and personalizing society:
It makes an original contribution in depth in building up the world, by
making possible a life that is, properly speaking, human, in particular
by guarding and transmitting virtues and "values." As the Second
Vatican Council states, in the family "the various generations come
together and help one another to grow wiser and to harmonize personal
rights, with the other requirements of social living" [106].
Consequently, faced with a society that is running the risk of becoming
more and more depersonalized and standardized and therefore inhuman and
dehumanizing, with the negative results of many forms of escapism -- such
as alcoholism, drugs and even terrorism -- the family possesses and continues
still to release formidable energies capable of taking man out of his
autonomity, keeping him conscious of his personal dignity, enriching him
with deep humanity and actively placing him, in his uniqueness and unrepeatability,
within the fabric of society.
44. The social and political role. ----------------------------------
The social role of the family certainly cannot stop short at procreation
and education even if this constitutes its primary and irreplaceable form
of expression.
Families therefore, either singly or in association, can and should devote
themselves to manifold social service activities, especially in favor
of the poor or at any rate for the benefit of all people and situations
that cannot be reached by the public authorities' welfare organization.
The social contribution of the family has an original character of its
own, one that should be given greater recognition and more decisive encouragement,
especially as the children grow up, and actually involving all its members
as much as possible [107].
In particular, note must be taken of the ever greater importance in our
society of hospitality in all its forms, from opening the door of one's
home, and still more of one's heart, to the pleas of one's brothers and
sisters, to concrete efforts to ensure that every family has its own home
as the natural environment that preserves it and makes it grow. In a special
way the Christian family is called upon to listen to the apostle's recommendation.
"Practice hospitality" [108] and therefore, imitating Christ's
example and sharing in his love, welcome the brother or sister in need:
"Whoever gives to one of these little ones even a cup of cold water
because he is a disciple, truly, I say to you, he shall not lose his reward"
[109].
The social role of families is called upon to find expression also in
the form of political intervention: Families should be the first to take
steps to see that the laws and institutions of the state not only do not
offend, but support and positively defend the rights and duties of the
family. Along these lines families should grow in awareness of being "protagonists"
of what is know as "family politics" and assume responsibility
for transforming society; otherwise families will be the first victims
of the evils that they have done no more than note with indifference.
The Second Vatican Council's appeal to go beyond an individualistic ethic
therefore holds good for the family as such [110].
45. Society at the service of the family. -----------------------------------------
Just as the intimate connection between the family and society demands
that the family be open to and participate in society its development,
so also it requires that society should never fail in its fundamental
task of respecting and fostering the family.
The family and society have complementary functions in defending and fostering
the good of each and every human being. But society -- more specifically
the state -- must recognize that "the family is a society in its
own original right" [111], and so society is under a grave obligation
in its relations with the family to adhere to the principle of subsidiarity.
The public authorities should take care not to take from families the
functions that they can just as well perform on their own or in free associations;
instead it must positively favor and encourage as far as possible responsible
initiative by families. In the conviction that the good of the family
is an indispensable and essential value of the civil community, the public
authorities must do everything possible to ensure that families have all
those aids -- economic, social, educational, political and cultural assistance
-- that they need in order to face all their responsibilities in a human
way.
46. The charter of family rights. ---------------------------------
The ideal of mutual support and development between the family and society
is often very seriously in conflict with the reality of their separation
and even in opposition.
In fact, as was repeatedly denounced by the synod, the situation experienced
by many families in various countries is highly problematical if not entirely
negative: Institutions and laws unjustly ignore the inviolable rights
of the family and of the human person; and society, far from putting itself
at the service of the family attacks it violently in its values and fundamental
requirements. Thus the family, which in God's plan is the basic cell of
society and subject of rights and duties before the state or any other
community, finds itself the victim of society, of the delays and slowness
with which it acts, and even of its blatant injustice.
For this reason the church openly and strongly defends the rights of the
family against the intolerable usurptions of society and the state. In
particular the synod fathers mentioned the following rights of the family:
-- The right to exist and progress as a family, that is to say, the right
of every human being, even if he or she is poor, to found a family and
to have adequate means to support it;
-- The right to exercise its responsibility regarding the transmission
of life and to educate children;
-- The right to the stability of the bond and of the institution of marriage;
-- The right to believe in and profess one's faith and to propagate it;
-- The right to bring up children in accordance with the family's own
traditions and religious and cultural values, with the necessary instruments,
means and institutions;
-- The right, especially of the poor and the sick, to obtain physical,
social, political and economic security;
-- The right to housing suitable for living family life in a proper way;
-- The right to expression and representation, either directly or through
associations, before the economic, social and cultural public authorities
and lower authorities;
-- The right to form associations with other families and institutions
in order to fulfill the family's role suitably and expeditiously;
-- The right to protect minors by adequate institutions and legislation
from harmful drugs, pornography, alcoholism, etc;
-- The right to wholesome recreation of a kind that also fosters family
values;
-- The right of the elderly to a worthy life and a worthy death;
-- The right to emigrate as a family in search of a better life [112].
Acceding to the synod's explicit request, the Holy See will give prompt
attention to studying these suggestions in depth and to the preparation
of a charter of rights of the family to be presented to the quarters and
authorities concerned.
47. The Christian family's grace and responsibility. ----------------------------------------------------
The social role that belongs to every family pertains by a new and original
right to the Christian family, which is based on the sacrament of marriage.
By taking up the human reality of the love between husband and wife in
all its implications, the sacrament gives to Christian couples and parents
a power and a commitment to live their vocation as lay people and therefore
to "seek the kingdom of God by engaging in temporal affairs and by
ordering them according to the plan of God" [113].
The social and political role is included in the kingly mission of service
in which Christian couples share by virtue of the sacrament of marriage,
and they receive both a command which they cannot ignore and a grace which
sustains and stimulates them.
The Christian family is thus called to offer everyone a witness of generous
and disinterested dedication to social matters through a "preferential
option" for the poor and disadvantaged. Therefore, advancing in its
following of the Lord by special love for all the poor, it must have special
concern for the hungry, the poor, the old, the sick, drug victims and
those who have no family.
48. For a new international order. ----------------------------------
In view of the worldwide dimension of various social questions nowadays,
the family has seen its role with regard to the development of society
extended in a completely new way: It now also involves cooperating for
a new international order, since it is only in worldwide solidarity that
the enormous and dramatic issues of world justice, the freedom of peoples
and the peace of humanity can be dealt with and solved.
The spiritual communion between Christian families, rooted in a common
faith and hope and give life by love constitutes an inner energy that
generates, spreads and develops justice, reconciliation, fraternity and
peace among human beings. Insofar as it is a "small scale church,"
the Christian family is called upon, like the "large-scale church,"
to be a sign of unity for the world and in this way to exercise its prophetic
role by bearing witness to the kingdom and peace of Christ, toward which
the whole world is journeying.
Christian families can do this through their educational activity -- that
is to say, by presenting to their children a model of life based on the
values of truth, freedom, justice and love -- both through active and
responsible involvement in the authentically human growth of society and
its institutions, and supporting in various ways the associations specifically
devoted to international issues.
------------------------------------------------------------------- Footnotes:
[105] Second Vatican Council, APOSTOLICAM ACTUOSITATEM, 11.
[106] GAUDIUM ET SPES, 52.
[107] Cf. Second Vatican Council, DIGNITATIS HUMANAE, 5.
[108] Rom. 12:13.
[109] Mt. 10:42.
[110] Cf. GAUDIUM ET SPES, 30.
[111] Second Vatican Council, DIGNITATIS HUMANAE, 5.
[112] Cf. PROPOSITIO 42.
[113] Second Vatican Council, LUMEN GENTIUM, 31.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
IV. SHARING IN THE LIFE AND MISSION OF THE CHURCH. --------------------------------------------------
49. The family within the mystery of the church. ------------------------------------------------
Among the fundamental tasks of the Christian family is its ecclesial task:
The family is placed at the service of the building up of the kingdom
of God in history by participating in the life and mission of the church.
In order to understand better the foundations, the contents and the characteristics
of this participation, we must examine the many profound bonds linking
the church and the Christian family and establishing the family as a "church
in miniature" (ecclesia domstica) [114], in such a way that in its
own way the family is a living image and historical representation of
the mystery of the church.
It is, above all, the church as mother that gives birth to, educates and
builds up the Christian family by putting into effect in its regard the
saving mission which she has received from her Lord. By proclaiming the
word of God the church reveals to the Christian family its true identity,
what it is and should be according to the Lord's plan: by celebrating
the sacraments the church enriches and strengthens the Christian family
with the grace of Christ for its sanctification to the glory of the Father:
by the continuous proclamation of the new commandment of love the church
encourages and guides the Christian family to the service of love so that
it may imitate and relive the same self-giving and sacrificial love that
the Lord Jesus has for the entire human race.
In turn, the Christian family is grafted into the mystery of the church
to such a degree as to become a sharer, in its own way, in the saving
mission proper to the church: By virtue of the sacrament Christian married
couples and parents "in their state and way of life have their own
special gift among the people of God" [115]. For this reason they
not only receive the love of Christ and become a saved community, but
they are also called upon to communicate Christ's love to their brethren
thus becoming a saving community. In this way, while the Christian family
is a fruit and sign of the supernatural fecundity of the church, it stands
also as a symbol, witness and participant of the church's motherhood [117].
50. A specific and original ecclesial role. -------------------------------------------
The Christian family is called upon to take part actively and responsibly
in the mission of the church in a way that is original and specific by
placing itself in what it is and what it does as an "intimate community
of life and love" at the service of the church and of society.
Since the Christian family is a community in which the relationships are
renewed by Christ through faith and the sacraments, the family's sharing
in the church's mission should follow a community pattern: The spouses
together as a couple, the parents and children as a family, must live
their service to the church and to the world. They must be "of one
heart and soul" [1176] in faith, through the shared apostolic zeal
that animates them and through their shared commitment to works of service
in the ecclesial and civil communities.
The Christian family also builds up the kingdom of God in history through
the everyday realities that concern and distinguish its state of life.
It is thus in the love between husband and wife and between the members
of the family -- a love lived out in all its extraordinary richness of
values and demands: totality, oneness, fidelity and fruitfulness [118]
-- that the Christian family's participation in the prophetic, priestly
and kingly mission of Jesus Christ and of his church finds expression
and realization. Therefore, love and life constitute the nucleus of the
saving mission of the Christian family in the church and for the church.
The Second Vatican Council recalls this fact when it writes: "Families
will share their spiritual riches generously with other families too.
Thus the Christian family, which springs from marriage as a reflection
of the loving covenant uniting Christ with the church, and as a participation
in that covenant will manifest to all people the savior's living presence
in the world, and the genuine nature of the church. This the family will
do by the mutual love of the spouses, by their generous fruitfulness,
their solidarity and faithfulness, and by the loving way in which all
the members of the family work together" [119].
Having laid the foundation of the participation of the christian family
in the church's mission, it is now time to illustrate its substance in
reference to Jesus Christ as prophet, priest and king -- three aspects
of a single reality -- by presenting the Christian family as 1) a believing
and evangelizing community, 2) a community in dialogue with God, and 3)
a community at the service of man.
A. A CHRISTIAN FAMILY AS A BELIEVING AND EVANGELIZING COMMUNITY. ----------------------------------------------------------------
51. Faith as the discovery and admiring awareness of God's plan for -------------------------------------------------------------------
the family. -----------
As a sharer in the life and mission of the church, which listens to the
word of God with reverence and proclaims it confidently [120], the Christian
family fulfills its prophetic role by welcoming and announcing the word
of God: It thus becomes more and more each day a believing and evangelizing
community.
Christian spouses and parents are required to offer "the obedience
of faith" [121]. They are called upon to welcome the word of the
Lord, which reveals to them the marvelous news -- the good news -- of
their conjugal and family life sanctified and made a source of sanctity
by Christ himself. Only in faith can they discover and admire with joyful
gratitude the dignity to which God has deigned to raise marriage and the
family, making them a sign and meeting place of the loving covenant between
God and man, between Jesus Christ and his bride, the church.
The very preparation for Christian marriage is itself a journey of faith.
It is a special opportunity for the engaged to rediscover and deepen the
faith received in baptism and nourished by their Christian upbringing.
In this way they come to recognize and freely accept their vocation to
follow Christ and to serve the kingdom of God in the married state.
The celebration of the sacrament of marriage is the basic moment of the
faith of the couple. This sacrament, in essence, is the proclamation in
the church of the good news, concerning married love. It is the word of
God that "reveals" and "fulfills" the wise and loving
plan of God for the married couple, giving them a mysterious and real
share in the very love with which God himself loves humanity. Since the
sacramental celebration of marriage is itself a proclamation of the word
of God, it must also be a "profession of faith" within and with
the church, as a community of believers, on the part of all those who
in different ways participate in its celebration.
This profession of faith demands that it be prolonged in the life of the
married couple and of the family. God, who called the couple to marriage,
continues to call them in marriage [122]. In and through the events, problems,
difficulties and circumstances of everyday life, God comes to them, revealing
and presenting the concrete "demands" of their sharing in the
love of Christ for his church in the particular family, social and ecclesial
situation in which they find themselves.
The discovery of and obedience to the plan of God on the part of the conjugal
and family community must take place in "togetherness," through
the human experience of love between husband and wife, between parents
and children, lived in the spirit of Christ.
Thus the little domestic church, like the greater church, needs to be
constantly and intensely evangelized: hence its duty regarding permanent
education in the faith.
52. The Christian family's ministry of evangelization. ------------------------------------------------------
To the extent in which the Christian family accepts the Gospel and matures
in faith, it becomes an evangelizing community. Let us listen again to
Paul VI: "The family, like the church, ought to be a place where
the Gospel is transmitted and from which the Gospel radiates. In a family
which is conscious of this mission, all the members evangelize and are
evangelized. The parents not only communicate the Gospel to their children,
but from their children they can themselves receive the same Gospel as
deeply lived by them. And such a family becomes the evangelizer of many
other families and of the neighborhood of which it forms a part"
[123].
As the synod repeated, taking up the appeal which I launched at Puebla,
the future of evangelization depends in great part on the church of the
home [124]. This apostolic mission of the family is rooted in baptism
and receives from the grace of the sacrament of marriage new strength
to transmit the faith, to sanctify and transform our present society according
to God's plan.
Particularly today the Christian family has a special vocation to witness
to the paschal covenant of Christ by constantly radiating the joy and
love and the certainty of hope for which it must give account: "The
Christian family loudly proclaims both the present virtues of the kingdom
of God and the hope of a blessed life to come" [125].
The absolute need for family catechists emerges with particular force
in certain situations that the church unfortunately experiences in some
places: "In places where anti-religious legislation endeavors even
to prevent education in the faith, and in places where widespread unbelief
or invasive secularism makes real religious growth practically impossible,
'the church of the home' remains the one place where children and young
people can receive an authentic catechesis" [126].
53. Ecclesial service. ----------------------
The ministry of evangelization carried out by Christian parents is original
and irreplaceable. It assumes the characteristics typical of family life
itself, which should be interwoven with love, simplicity, practicality
and daily witness [127].
The family must educate the children for life in such a way that each
one may fully perform his or her role according to the vocation received
from God. Indeed the family that is open to transcendent values, that
serves its brothers and sisters with joy, that fulfills its duties with
generous fidelity and is aware of its daily sharing in the mystery of
the glorious cross of Christ, becomes the primary and most excellent seedbed
of vocations to a life of consecration to the kingdom of God.
The parents' ministry of evangelization and catechesis ought to play a
part in their children's lives also during adolescence and youth, when
the children, as often happens, challenge or even reject the Christian
faith received in earlier years. Just as in the church the work of evangelization
can never be separated from the sufferings of the apostle, so in the Christian
family parents must face with courage and great interior serenity the
difficulties that their ministry of evangelization sometimes encounters
in their own children.
It should not be forgotten that the service rendered by Christian spouses
and parents to the Gospel is essentially an ecclesial service. It has
its place within the context of the whole church as an evangelized and
evangelizing community. Insofar as the ministry of evangelization and
catechesis of the church of the home is rooted in and derives from the
one mission of the church and is ordained to the upbuilding of the one
body of Christ [126], it must remain in intimate communion and collaborate
responsibly with all the other evangelizing and catechetical activities
present and at work in the ecclesial community at the diocesan and parochial
levels.
54. To preach the Gospel to the whole creation. -----------------------------------------------
Evangelization, urged on within by irrepressible missionary zeal, is characterized
by a universality without boundaries. It is the response to Christ's explicit
and unequivocal command: "Go into all the world and preach the Gospel
to the whole creation" [129].
The Christian family's faith and evangelizing mission also possesses this
Catholic missionary inspiration. The sacrament of marriage takes up and
reproposes the task of defending and spreading the faith, a task that
has its roots in baptism and confirmation [130], and makes Christian married
couples and parents witnesses of Christ "to the end of the earth"
[131], missionaries, in the true and proper sense, of love and life.
A form of missionary activity can be exercised even within the family.
This happens when some member of the family does not have the faith or
does not practice it with consistency. In such a case the other members
must give him or her a living witness of their own faith in order to encourage
and support him or her along the path toward full acceptance of Christ
the savior [132].
Animated in its own inner life by missionary zeal, the church of the home
is also called to be a luminous sign of the presence of Christ and of
his love for those who are "far away," for families who do not
yet believe and for those Christian families who no longer live in accordance
with the faith that they once received. The Christian family is called
to enlighten "by its example and its witness those who seek the truth"
[133].
Just as at the dawn of Christianity Aquila and Priscilla were presented
as a missionary couple [134], so today the church shows forth her perennial
newness and fruitfulness by the presence of Christian couples and families
who dedicate at least a part of their lives to working in missionary territories,
proclaiming the Gospel and doing service to their fellow man in the love
of Jesus Christ.
Christian families offer a special contribution to the missionary cause
of the church by fostering missionary vocations among their sons and daughters
and, more generally, "by training their children from childhood to
recognize God's love for all people" [136].
B. THE CHRISTIAN FAMILY AS A COMMUNITY IN DIALOGUE WITH GOD. ------------------------------------------------------------
55. The church's sanctuary in the home. ---------------------------------------
The proclamation of the Gospel and its acceptance in faith reach their
fullness in the celebration of the sacraments. The church which is a believing
and evangelizing community is also a priestly people invested with the
dignity and sharing in the power of Christ the high priest of the new
and eternal covenant [137].
The Christian family too is part of this priestly people which is the
church. By means of the sacrament of marriage, in which it is rooted and
from which it draws its nourishment, the Christian family is continuously
vivified by the Lord Jesus and called and engaged by him in a dialogue
with God through the sacraments, through the offerings of one's life and
through prayer.
This is the priestly role which the Christian family can and ought to
exercise in intimate communion with the whole church through the daily
realities of married and family life. In this way the Christian family
is called to be sanctified and to sanctify the ecclesial community and
the world.
56. Marriage as a sacrament of mutual sanctification and an act of ------------------------------------------------------------------
of worship. -----------
The sacrament of marriage is the specific source and original means of
sanctification for Christian married couples and families. It takes up
again and makes specific the sanctifying grace of baptism. By virtue of
the mystery of the death and resurrection of Christ, of which the spouses
are made part in a new way by marriage, conjugal love is purified and
made holy: "This love the Lord has judged worthy of special gifts,
healing, perfecting and exalting of grace and of charity" [138].
The gift of Jesus Christ is not exhausted in the actual celebration of
the sacrament of marriage, but rather accompanies the married couple throughout
their lives. This fact is explicitly recalled by the Second Vatican Council
when it says that Jesus Christ "abides with them so that just as
he loved the church and handed himself over on her behalf, the spouses
may love each other with perpetual fidelity through mutual self-bestowal
... For this reason, Christian spouses have a special sacrament by which
they are fortified and receive a kind of consecration in the duties and
dignity of their state. By virtue of this sacrament, as spouses fulfill
their conjugal and family obligations they are penetrated with the spirit
of Christ, who fills their whole lives with faith, hope and charity. Thus
they increasingly advance toward their own perfection as well as toward
their mutual sanctification, and hence contribute jointly to the glory
of God" [139].
Christian spouses and parents are included in the universal call to sanctity.
For them this call is specified by the sacrament they have celebrated
and is carried out concretely in the realities proper to their conjugal
and family life [140]. This gives rise to the grace and requirement of
an authentic and profound conjugal and family spirituality that draws
its inspiration from the themes of creation, covenant, cross, resurrection
and sign, which were stressed more than once by the synod.
Christian marriage, like the other sacraments, "whose purpose is
to sanctify people, to build up the body of Christ, and finally, to give
worship to God" [141], is in itself a liturgical action glorifying
God in Jesus Christ and in the church. By celebrating it, Christian spouses
profess their gratitude to God for the sublime gift bestowed on them of
being able to live in their married and family lives the very love of
God for people and that of the Lord Jesus for the church, his bride.
Just as husbands and wives receive from the sacrament the gift and responsibility
of translating into daily living the sanctification bestowed on them,
so the same sacrament confers on them the grace and moral obligation of
transforming their whole lives into a "spiritual sacrifice"
[142]. What the council says of the laity applies also to Christian spouses
and parents, especially with regard to the earthly and temporal realities
that characterize their lives: "As worshippers leading holy lives
in every place, the laity consecrate the world itself to God" [143].
57. Marriage and the eucharist. -------------------------------
The Christian family's sanctifying role is grounded in baptism and has
its highest expression in the eucharist, to which Christian marriage is
intimately connected. The Second Vatican Council drew attention to the
unique relationship between the eucharist and marriage by requesting that
"marriage normally be celebrated within the Mass" [144]. To
understand better and live more intensely the graces and responsibilities
of Christian marriage and family life, it is altogether necessary to rediscover
and strengthen this relationship.
The eucharist is the very source of Christian marriage. The eucharistic
sacrifice in fact represents Christ's covenant of love with the church,
sealed with his blood on the cross [145]. In this sacrifice of the new
and eternal covenant, Christian spouses encounter the source from which
their own marriage covenant flows, is interiorly structured and continuously
renewed. As a representation of Christ's sacrifice of love for the church,
the eucharist is a fountain of charity. In the eucharistic "communion"
and its "mission": By partaking in the eucharistic bread, the
different members of the Christian family become one body which reveals
and shares in the wider unity of the church. Their sharing becomes a never-ending
source of missionary and apostolic dynamism for the Christian family.
58. The sacrament of conversion and reconciliation. ---------------------------------------------------
An essential and permanent part of the Christian family's sanctifying
role consists in accepting the call to conversion that the Gospel addresses
to all Christians, who do not always remain faithful to the "newness"
of the baptism that constitutes them "saints." The Christian
family too is sometimes unfaithful to the law of baptismal grace and holiness
proclaimed anew in the sacrament of marriage.
Repentance and mutual pardon within the bosom of the Christian family,
so much a part of daily life, receive their specific sacramental expression
in Christian penance. In the encyclical HUMANAE VITAE, Paul VI wrote to
married couples: "And if sin should still keep its hold over them,
let them not be discouraged, but rather have recourse with humble perseverance
to the mercy of God, which is abundantly poured forth in the sacrament
of penance" [146].
The celebration of this sacrament acquires special significance for family
life. While they discover in faith that sin contradicts not only the covenant
with God, but also the covenant between husband and wife and the communion
of the family, the married couple and the other members of the family
are led to an encounter with God, who is "rich in mercy" [147],
who bestows on them his love which is more powerful than sin [148], and
who reconstructs and brings to perfection the marriage covenant and the
family communion.
59. Family Prayer. ------------------
The church prays for the Christian family and educates the family to live
in generous accord with the priestly gift and role received from Christ
the high priest. In effect, the baptismal priesthood of the faithful exercised
in the sacrament of marriage constitutes the basis of a priestly vocation
and mission for the spouses and family by which their daily lives are
transformed into "spiritual sacrifices acceptable to God through
Jesus Christ" [149]. This transformation is achieved not only by
celebrating the eucharist and the other sacraments and through offering
themselves to the glory of God, but also through a life of prayer, through
prayerful dialogue with the Father, through Jesus Christ, in the Holy
Spirit.
Family prayer has its own characteristic qualities. It is prayer offered
in common, husband and wife together, parents and children together. Communion
in prayer is both a consequence of and a requirement for the communion
bestowed by the sacraments of baptism and matrimony. The words with which
the Lord Jesus promises his presence can be applied to the members of
the Christian family in a special way: "Again I say to you, if two
of you agree on earth about anything they ask it will be done for them
by my Father in heaven. For where two or three are gathered in my name,
there am I in the midst of them" [150].
Family prayer has for its very own object family life itself, which in
all its varying circumstances is seen as a call from God and lived as
a filial response to his call. Joys and sorrows, hopes and disappointments,
births and birthday celebrations, wedding anniversaries of the parents,
departures, separations and homecomings, important and far-reaching decisions,
the death of those who are dear, etc -- all of these mark God's loving
intervention in the family's history. They should be seen as suitable
moments for thanksgiving, for petition, for trusting abandonment of the
family into the hands of their common Father in heaven. The dignity and
responsibility of the Christian family as the domestic church can be achieved
only with God's unceasing aid, which will surely be granted if it is humbly
and trustingly petitioned in prayer.
60. Educators in Prayer. ------------------------
By reason of their dignity and mission, Christian parents have the specific
responsibility of educating their children in prayer, introducing them
to gradual discovery of the mystery of God and to personal dialogue with
him: "It is particularly in the Christian family, enriched by the
grace and the office of the sacrament of matrimony, that from the earliest
years children should be taught, according to the faith received in baptism,
to have a knowledge of God, to worship him and to love their neighbor"
[151].
The concrete example and living witness of parents is fundamental and
irreplaceable in educating their children to pray. Only by praying together
with their children can a father and mother -- exercising their royal
priesthood -- penetrate the innermost depths of their children's hearts
and leave an impression that the future events in their lives will not
be able to efface.
Let us again listen to the appeal made by Paul Vi to parents: "Mothers,
do you teach your children the Christian prayers? Do you prepare them,
in conjunction with the priests, for the sacraments that they receive
when they are young: confession, communion and confirmation? Do you encourage
them when they are sick to think of Christ suffering, to invoke the aid
of the Blessed Virgin and the saints? Do you say the family rosary together?
And you, fathers, do you pray with your children, with the whole domestic
community, at least sometimes? Your example of honesty in thought and
action, joined to some common prayer, is a lesson for life, an act of
worship of singular value. In this way you bring peace to your homes:
Pax huic domui. Remember, it is thus that you build up the church"
[152].
61. Liturgical prayer and private prayer. -----------------------------------------
There exists a deep and vital bond between the prayer of the church and
the prayer of the individual faithful as has been clearly reaffirmed by
the Second Vatican Council [153]. An important purpose of the prayer of
the domestic church is to serve as the natural introduction for the children
to the liturgical prayer of the whole church, both in the sense of preparing
for it and of extending it into personal, family and social life. Hence
the need for gradual participation by all the members of the Christian
family in the celebration of the eucharist, especially on Sundays and
feast days, and of the other sacraments, particularly the sacraments of
Christian initiation of the children. The directives of the council opened
up a new possibility for the Christian family when it listed the family
among those groups to whom it recommends the recitation of the Divine
Office in common [154]. Likewise, the Christian family will strive to
celebrate at home and in a way suited to the members the times and feasts
of the liturgical year.
As preparation for the worship celebrated in church and as its prolongation
in the home, the Christian family makes use of private prayer, which presents
a great variety of forms. While this variety testifies to the extraordinary
richness with which the spirit vivifies Christian prayer, it serves also
to meet the various needs and life situations of those who turn to the
Lord in prayer. Apart from morning and evening prayers, certain forms
of prayer are to be expressly encouraged, following the indications of
the synod fathers, such as reading and meditating on the word of God,
preparation for the reception of the sacraments, devotion and consecration
to the Sacred Heart of Jesus, various forms of veneration of the Blessed
Virgin Mary, grace before and after meals and observance of popular devotions.
While respecting the freedom of the children of God, the church has always
proposed certain practices of piety to the faithful with particular solicitude
and insistence. Among these should be mentioned the recitation of the
rosary: "We now desire, as a continuation of the thought of our predecessors,
to recommend strongly the recitation of the family rosary ... There is
no doubt that ... the rosary should be considered as one of the best and
most efficacious prayers in common that the Christian family is invited
to recite. We like to think and sincerely hope that when the family gathering
becomes a time of prayer the rosary is a frequent and favored manner of
praying" [155]. In this way authentic devotion to Mary, which finds
expression in sincere love and generous imitation of the Blessed Virgin's
interior spiritual attitude, constitutes a special instrument for nourishing
loving communion in the family and for developing conjugal and family
spirituality. For she who is the mother of Christ and of the church is
in a special way the mother of Christian families, of domestic churches.
62. Prayer and life. --------------------
It should never be forgotten that prayer constitutes an essential part
of Christian life, understood in its fullness and centrality. Indeed,
prayer is an important part of our very humanity: It is "the first
expression of man's inner truth, the first condition for authentic freedom
of spirit" [156].
Far from being a form of escapism from everyday commitments, prayer constitutes
the strongest incentive for the Christian family to assume and comply
fully with all its responsibilities as the primary and fundamental cell
of human society. Thus the Christian family's actual participation in
the church's life and mission is the direct proportion to the fidelity
and intensity of the prayer with which it is united with the fruitful
vine that is Christ the Lord [157].
The fruitfulness of the Christian family in its specific service to human
advancement, which of itself cannot but lead to the transformation of
the world, derives from its living union with Christ, nourished by the
liturgy, by self-oblation and by prayer [158].
C.THE CHRISTIAN FAMILY AS A COMMUNITY AT THE SERVICE OF MAN. ------------------------------------------------------------
63. The new commandment of love. -------------------------------
The church, a prophetic, priestly and kingly people, is endowed with the
mission of bringing all human beings to accept the word of God in faith,
to celebrate and profess it in the sacraments and in prayer, and to give
expression to it in the concrete realities of life in accordance with
the gift and new commandment of love.
The law of Christian life is to be found not in a written code, but in
the personal action of the Holy Spirit who inspires and guides the Christian.
It is the "law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus" [159]:
"God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit
who has been given to us" [160].
This is true for the Christian couple and family. Their guide and rule
of life is the Spirit of Jesus poured into their hearts in the celebration
of the sacrament of matrimony. In continuity with baptism in water and
the Spirit, marriage sets forth anew the evangelical law of love, and
with the gift of the Spirit engraves it more profoundly on the hearts
of Christian husbands and wives. Their love, purified and saved, is a
fruit of the Spirit acting in the hearts of believers and constituting,
at the same time, the fundamental commandment of their moral life to be
lived in responsible freedom.
Thus the Christian family is inspired and guided by the new law of the
Spirit and, in intimate communion with the church, the kingly people,
it is called to exercise its "service" of love toward God and
toward its fellow human beings.
Just as Christ exercises his royal power by serving us [161], so also
the Christian finds the authentic meaning of his participation in the
kingship of his Lord in sharing his spirit and practice of service to
man. "Christ has communicated this power to his disciples that they
might be established in royal freedom and that by self-denial and a holy
life they might conquer the reign of sin in themselves (cf. Rom. 6:12).
Further, he has shared this power so that by serving him in their fellow
human beings they might through humility and patience lead their brothers
and sisters to that King whom to serve is to reign. For the Lord wishes
to spread his kingdom by means of the laity also, a kingdom of truth and
life, a kingdom of holiness and grace, a kingdom of justice, love and
peace. In this kingdom, creation itself will be delivered out of its slavery
to corruption and into the freedom of the glory of the children of God
(cf. Rom. 8:21)" [162].
64. To discover the image of God in each brother and sister. ------------------------------------------------------------
Inspired and sustained by the new commandment of love, the Christian family
welcomes, respects and serves every human being, considering each one
in his or her dignity as a person and as a child of God.
It should be so especially between husband and wife and within the family,
through a daily effort to promote a truly personal community, initiated
and fostered by an inner communion of love. This way of life should then
be extended to the wider circle of the ecclesial community of which the
Christian family is part.
Thanks to love within the family, the church can and ought to take on
a more homelike or family dimension, developing a more human and fraternal
style of relationships.
Love, too, goes beyond our brothers and sisters of the same faith since
"everybody is my brother or sister." In each individual, especially
in the poor, the weak and those who suffer or are unjustly treated, love
knows how to discover the face of Christ, and discover a fellow human
being to be loved and served.
In order that the family may serve man in a truly evangelical way, the
instructions of the Second Vatican Council must be carefully put into
practice: "That the exercise of such charity may rise above any deficiencies
in fact and even in appearance, certain fundamentals must be observed.
Thus attention is to be paid to the image of God in which our neighbor
has been created, and also to Christ the Lord to whom is really offered
whatever is given to a needy person" [163].
While building up the church in love, the Christian family places itself
at the service of the human person and the world, really bringing about
the "human advancement" whose substance was given in summary
form in the synod's message to families: "Another task for the family
is to from persons in love and also to practice love in all its relationships,
so that it does not live closed in on itself, but remains open to the
community, moved by a sense of justice and concern for others, as well
as by a consciousness of its responsibility toward the whole of society"
[164].
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Footnotes:
[114] Cf. Second Vatican Council, LUMEN GENTIUM, 11; APOSTOLICAM ACTUOSITATEM,
11; Pope John Paul II, Homily for the Opening of the Sixth Synod of Bishops
(Sept. 26, 1980), 3: AAS 72 (1980) 1008.
[115] Second Vatican Council, LUMEN GENTIUM, 11.
[116] Cf. Ibid, 41.
[117] Acts 4:32.
[118] Cf. Paul VI, HUMANAE VITAE, 9.
[119] GAUDIUM ET SPES, 48.
[120] Cf. Second Vatican Council, DEI VERBUM, 1.
[121] Rom. 16:26.
[122] Cf. Paul VI, HUMANAE VITAE, 25.
[123] EVANGELII NUNTIANDI, 71.
[124] Cf. Address to the Third General Assembly of the Bishops of Latin
America (Jan. 28, 1979(, IV, A: AAS 71 (1979), 204.
[125] Second Vatican Council, LUMEN GENTIUM, 35.
[126] John Paul II, Apostolic Exhortation, CATECHISI TRADENDAE, 68: AAS
71 (1979), 1334.
[127] Cf. Ibid, 36, loc. cit. 1308.
[128] Cf. 1 Cor. 12:4-6; Eph. 4:12-13.
[129] Mk. 16:15.
[130] Cf. Second Vatican Council, LUMEN GENTIUM, 11.
[131] Acts. 1:8.
[132] Cf. 1 Pt. 3:1-2.
[133] Second Vatican Council, LUMEN GENTIUM, 35; cf. APOSTOLICAM ACTUOSITATEM,
11.
[134] Cf. Acts 18; Rom. 16:3-4.
[135] Cf. Second Vatican Council, AD GENTES, 39.
[136] Second Vatican Council, APOSTOLICAM ACTUOSITATEM, 30.
[137] Cf. Second Vatican Council, LUMEN GENTIUM, 10.
[138] Second Vatican Council, GAUDIUM ET SPES, 49.
[139] Ibid, 48.
[140] Cf. Second Vatican Council, LUMEN GENTIUM, 41.
[141] Second Vatican Council, SACROSANCTUM CONCILIUM, 59.
[142] Cf. 1 Pt. 2:5; Second Vatican Council, LUMEN GENTIUM, 34.
[143] Second Vatican Council, LUMEN GENTIUM, 34.
[144] SACROSANTUM CONCILIUM, 78.
[145] Cf. Jn. 19:34.
[146] Section 25: AAS (1968), 499.
[147] Eph. 2:4.
[148] Cf. John Paul II, Encyclical DIVES IN MISERICORDIA, 13: AAS 72 (1980),
1218-1219.
[149] 1 Pt. 2:5.
[150] Mt. 18:19-20.
[151] Second Vatican Council, GRAVISSIUM EDUCATIONIS, 3; cf. Pope John
Paul II, CATECHESI TRANDENDAE, 36: AAS 71 (1979), 1308.
[152] General Audience Address, Aug. 11, 1976: INSEGNAMENTI DI PAOLO VI,
XIV (1976), 640.
[153] Cf. SACROSANCTUM CONCILIUM, 12.
[154] Cf. INSTITUTIO GENRALIS DE LITUGIA HORARUM, 27.
[155] Paul VI, Apostolic Exhortation MARIALIS CULTUS, 52, 54: AAS 66 (1974),
160-161.
[156] John Paul II, Address at the Mentorella Shrine (Oct. 28, 1978):
INSEGNAMENTI, I (1978), 78-79.
[157] Cf. Second Vatican Council, APOSTOLICAM ACTUOSITATEM, 4.
[158] Cf. John Paul I, Address to the Bishops of the 12th Pastoral Region
of the United States (Sept. 21, 1978): AAS, 70 (1978), 767.
[159] Rom. 8:2.
[160] Rom. 5:5.
[161] Cf. Mk. 10:45.
[162] Second Vatican Council, LUMEN GENTIUM, 36.
[163] APOSTOLICAM ACTUOSITATEM, 8.
[164] Cf. Synod of Bishops' Message to Christian Families (Oct. 24, 1980),
12.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
PART FOUR PASTORAL CARE OF THE FAMILY
I. STAGES OF PASTORAL CARE OF THE FAMILY. -----------------------------------------
65. The church accompanies the Christian family on its journey --------------------------------------------------------------
through life. -------------
Like every other living reality, the family too is called upon to develop
and grow. After the preparation of engagement and the sacramental celebration
of marriage, the couple begin their daily journey toward the progressive
actuation of the values and duties of marriage itself.
In light of faith and by virtue of hope, the Christian family, too, shares
in communion with the church and in the experience of the earthly pilgrimage
toward full revelation and manifestation of the kingdom of God.
Therefore, it must be emphasized once more that the pastoral intervention
of the church in support of the family is a matter of urgency. Every effort
should be made to strengthen and develop pastoral care for the family,
which should be treated as a real matter of priority, in the certainty
that future evangelization depends largely on the domestic church [165].
The church's pastoral concern will not be limited only to the Christian
families closest at hand; it will extend its horizons in harmony with
the heart of Christ and will show itself to be even more lively for families
in general and for those families in particular which are in difficult
or irregular situations. For all of them the church will have a word of
truth, goodness, understanding, hope and deep sympathy with their sometimes
tragic difficulties. To all of them she will offer her disinterested help
so that they can come closer to that model of a family which the creator
intended from "the beginning" and which Christ has renewed with
his redeeming grace.
The church's pastoral action must be progressive also in the sense that
it must follow the family, accompanying it step by step in the different
stages of its formation and development.
66. Preparation for marriage. -----------------------------
More than ever necessary in our times is preparation of young people for
marriage and family life. In some countries it is still the families themselves
that, according to ancient customs, ensure the passing on to young people
of the values concerning married and family life, and they do this through
a gradual process of education or initiation. But the changes that have
taken place within almost all modern societies demand that not only the
family but also society and the church should be involved in the effort
of properly preparing young people for their future responsibilities.
Many negative phenomena which are today noted with regret in family life
derive from the fact that in the new situations young people not only
lost sight of the correct hierarchy of values but, since they have no
longer certain criteria of behavior, they do not know how to face and
deal with the new difficulties. But experience teaches that young people
who have been well prepared for family life generally succeed better than
others.
This is even more applicable to Christian marriage, which influences the
holiness of large numbers of men and women. The church must therefore
promote better and more intensive programs of marriage preparation in
order to eliminate as far as possible the difficulties that many married
couples find themselves in, and even more in order to favor positively
the establishing and maturing of successful marriages.
Marriage preparation has to be seen and put into practice as a gradual
and continuous process. It includes three main stages: remote, proximate
and immediate preparation.
Remote preparation begins in early childhood in that wise family training
which leads children to discover themselves as beings endowed with a rich
and complex psychology and with a particular personality with its own
strengths and weaknesses. It is the period when esteem for all authentic
human values is instilled, both in interpersonal and in social relationships,
with all that this signifies for the formation of character, for the control
and right use of one's inclinations, for the manner of regarding and meeting
people of the opposite sex, and so on. Also necessary, especially for
Christians, is solid spiritual and catechetical formation that will show
that marriage is a true vocation and mission, without excluding the possibility
of the total gift of self to God in the vocation to the priestly or religious
life.
Upon this basis there will subsequently and gradually be built up the
proximate preparation, which -- from a suitable age and with adequate
catechesis, as in a catechumenal process -- involves a more specific preparation
for the sacraments, as it were, a rediscovery of them. This renewed catechesis
of young people and others preparing for Christian marriage is absolutely
necessary in order that the sacrament may be celebrated and lived with
the right moral and spiritual dispositions. The religious formation of
young people should be integrated, at the right moment and in accordance
with the various concrete requirements, with a preparation for life as
a couple. This preparation will present marriage as an interpersonal relationship
of a man and a woman that has to be continually developed, and will encourage
those concerned to study the nature of conjugal sexuality and responsible
parenthood, with the essential medical and biological knowledge connected
with it. It will also acquaint those concerned with correct methods for
the education of children and will assist them in gaining the basic requisites
for well-ordered family life, such as stable work, sufficient financial
resources, sensible administration, notions of housekeeping.
Finally, one must not overlook preparation for the family apostolate,
for fraternal solidarity and collaboration with other families, for active
membership in groups, associations, movements and undertakings set up
for the human and Christian benefit of the family.
The immediate preparation for the celebration of the sacrament of matrimony
should take place in the months and weeks immediately preceding the wedding
so as to give a new meaning, content, and form to the so-called premarital
inquiry required by canon law. This preparation is not only necessary
in every case, but is also more urgently needed for engaged couples that
still manifest shortcomings or difficulties in Christian doctrine and
practice.
Among the elements to be instilled in this journey of faith, which is
similar to the catechumate, there must also be a deeper knowledge of the
mystery of Christ and the church, of the meaning of grace and of the responsibility
of Christian marriage, as well as preparation for taking an active and
conscious part in the rites of the marriage liturgy.
The Christian family and the whole of the ecclesial community should feel
involved in the different phases of the preparation for marriage which
have been described only in their broad outlines. It is to be hoped that
the episcopal conferences, just as they are concerned with appropriate
initiatives to help engaged couples to be more aware of the seriousness
of their choice and also to help pastors of souls to make sure of the
couples' proper dispositions, so they will also take steps to see that
there is issued a directory for the pastoral care of the family. In this
they should lay down in the first place, the minimum content, duration
and method of the "preparation courses," balancing the different
aspects -- doctrinal, pedagogical, legal and medical -- concerning marriage
and structuring them in such a way that those preparing for marriage will
not only receive an intellectual training, but will also feel a desire
to enter actively into the ecclesial community.
Although one must not underestimate the necessity and obligation of the
immediate preparation for marriage -- which would happen if dispensations
from it were easily given -- nevertheless such preparation must always
be set forth and put into practice in such a way that omitting it is not
an impediment to the celebration of marriage.
67. The celebration. --------------------
Christian marriage normally requires a liturgical celebration expressing
in social and community form the essentially ecclesial and sacramental
nature of the conjugal covenant between baptized persons.
Inasmuch as it is a sacramental action of sanctification, the celebration
of marriage -- inserted into the liturgy, which is the summit of the church's
action and the source of her sanctifying power [166] -- must be per se
valid, worthy and fruitful. This opens a wide field for pastoral solicitude,
in order that the needs deriving from the nature of the conjugal covenant,
elevated into a sacrament, may be fully met and also in order that the
church's discipline regarding free consent, impediments, the canonical
form and the actual rite of the celebration may be faithfully observed.
The celebration should be simple and dignified, according to the norms
of the competent authorities of the church. It is also for them -- in
accordance with concrete circumstances of time and place and in conformity
with the norms issued by the Apostolic See [167] -- to include in the
liturgical celebration such elements proper to each culture which serve
to express more clearly the profound human and religious significance
of the marriage contract, provided that such elements contain nothing
that is not in harmony with Christian faith and morality.
Inasmuch as it is a sign, the liturgical celebration should be conducted
in such a way as to constitute, also in its external reality, a proclamation
of the word of God and a profession of faith on the part of the community
of believers. Pastoral commitment will be expressed here through the intelligent
and careful preparation of the liturgy of the word and through the education
to faith of those participating in the celebration and in the first place
the couple being married.
Inasmuch as it is a sacramental action of the church, the liturgical celebration
of marriage should involve the Christian community, with the full, active
and responsible participation of all those present according to the place
and task of each individual: the bride and bridegroom, the priest, the
witnesses, the relatives, the friends, the other members of the faithful,
all of them members of an assembly that manifests and lives the mystery
of Christ and His church. For the celebration of Christian marriage in
the sphere of ancestral cultures or traditions, the principles laid down
above should be followed.
68. Celebration of marriage and evangelization of non-believing ---------------------------------------------------------------
baptized persons. -----------------
Precisely because in the celebration of the sacrament very special attention
must be devoted to the moral and spiritual dispositions of those being
married, in particular to their faith, we must here deal with a not infrequent
difficulty in which the pastors of the church can find themselves in the
context of our secularized society.
In fact, the faith of the person asking the church for marriage can exist
in different degrees, and it is the primary duty of pastors to bring about
a rediscovery of this faith and to nourish it and bring it to maturity.
But pastors must also understand the reasons that led the church also
to admit the celebration of marriage those who are imperfectly disposed.
The sacrament of matrimony has this specific element that distinguishes
it from all the other sacraments: It is the sacrament of something that
was part of the very economy of creation; it is the very conjugal covenant
instituted by the Creator "in the beginning.: Therefore the decision
of a man and a woman to marry in accordance with this divine plan, that
is to say, the decision to commit by their irrevocable conjugal consent
their whole lives in indissoluble love and unconditional fidelity, really
involves, even if not in a fully conscious way, an attitude of profound
obedience to the will of God, an attitude which cannot exist without God's
grace. They have thus already begun what is in a true and proper sense
a journey toward salvation, a journey which the celebration of the sacrament
and the immediate preparation for it can complement and bring to completion,
given the uprightness of their intention.
On the other hand it is true that in some places engaged couples ask to
be married in church for motives which are social rather than genuinely
religious. This is not surprising. Marriage, in fact, is not an event
that concerns only the persons actually getting married. By its very nature
it is also a social matter, committing the couple being married in the
eyes of society. And its celebration has always been an occasion of rejoicing
that brings together families and friends. It therefore goes without saying
that social as well as personal motives enter into the request to be married
in church.
Nevertheless, it must not be forgotten that these engaged couples by virtue
of their baptism are already really sharers in Christ's marriage covenant
with the church, and that, by their right intention, they have accepted
God's plan regarding marriage and therefore, at least implicitly, consent
to what the church intends to do when she celebrates marriage. Thus the
fact that motives of a social nature also enter into the request is not
enough to justify refusal on the part of pastors. Moreover, as the Second
Vatican Council teaches, the sacraments by words and ritual elements nourish
and strengthen faith [168]: that faith toward which the married couple
are already journeying by reason of the uprightness of their intention,
which Christ's grace certainly does not fail to favor and support.
As for wishing to lay down further criteria for admission to the ecclesial
celebration of marriage, criteria that would concern the level of faith
of those to be married, this would above all involve grave risks. In the
first place, the risk of making unfounded and discriminatory judgements;
second, the risk of causing doubts about the validity of marriages already
celebrated, with grave harm to Christian communities and new and unjustified
anxieties to the consciences of married couples; one would also fall into
the danger of calling into question the sacramental nature of many marriages
of brethren separated from full communion with the Catholic Church, thus
contradicting ecclesial tradition.
However, when in spite of all efforts couples show that they reject explicitly
and formally what the church intends to do when the marriage of baptized
persons is celebrated, the pastor of souls cannot admit them to the celebration
of marriage. In spite of his reluctance to do so, he has the duty to take
note of the situation and to make it clear to those concerned that in
these circumstances it is not the church that is placing an obstacle in
the way of the celebration that they are asking for, but themselves.
Once more there appears in all its urgency the need for evangelization
and catechesis before and after marriage, effected by the whole Christian
community, so that every man and woman that gets married celebrates the
sacrament of matrimony not only validly but also fruitfully.
69. Pastoral care after marriage. ---------------------------------
The pastoral care of the regularly established family signifies, in practice,
the commitment of all the members of the local ecclesial community to
helping the couple to discover and live their new vocation and mission.
In order that the family may be ever more a true community of love, it
is necessary that all its members should be helped and trained in their
responsibilities as they face the new problems that arise, in mutual service
and in active sharing in family life.
This holds true especially for young families, which, finding themselves
in a context of new values and responsibilities, are more vulnerable,
especially in the first years of marriage, to possible difficulties such
as those created by adaptation to life together or by the birth of children.
Young married couples should learn to accept willingly and make good use
of the discreet, tactful and generous help offered by other couples that
already have more experience of married and family life. Thus within the
ecclesial community -- the great family made up of Christian families
-- there will take place a mutual exchange of presence and help among
all the families, each one putting at the service of the others its own
experience of life, as well as the gifts of faith and grace. Animated
by a true apostolic spirit, this assistance from family to family will
constitute one of the simplest, most effective and most accessible means
for transmitting from one to another those Christian values which are
both the starting point and goal of all pastoral care. Thus young families
will not limit themselves merely to receiving, but in their turn, having
been helped in this way, will become a source of enrichment for other
longer established families through their witness of life and practical
contribution.
In her pastoral care of young families the church must also pay special
attention to helping them to live married love responsibly in relationship
with its demands on communion and service to live. She must likewise help
them to harmonize the intimacy of home life with the generous shared work
of building up the church and society. When children are born and the
married couple becomes a family in the full and specific sense, the church
will still remain close to the parents in order that they may accept their
children and love them as a fit received from the Lord of life and joyfully
accept the task of serving them in their human and Christian growth.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Footnotes:
[165] Cf. John Paul II, Address to the Third General Assembly of the Bishops
of Latin America (Jan. 28, 1979), IV, A: AAS 71 (1979), 204.
[166] Cf. Second Vatican Council, SACROSANCTUM CONCILIUM, 10.
[167] Cf. ORDO CELBRANDI MATRIMONIUM, 17.
[168] Cf. Second Vatican Council, SACROSANCTUM CONCILIUM, 59.
------------------------------------------------------------------
II. STRUCTURES OF FAMILY PASTORAL CARE. ---------------------------------------
Pastoral activity is always the dynamic expression of the reality of the
church, committed to her mission of salvation. Family pastoral care too
-- which is a particular and specific form of pastoral activity -- has
as its operative principle and responsible agent the church herself, through
her structures and workers.
70. The ecclesial community and in particular the parish. ---------------------------------------------------------
The church, which is at the same time a saved and a saving community,
has to be considered here under two aspects: as universal and particular.
The second aspect is expressed and actuated in the diocesan community,
which is pastorally divided up into lesser communities of which the parish
is of special importance.
Communion with the universal church does not hinder, but rather guarantees
and promotes the substance and originality of the various particular churches.
These latter remain more immediate and more effective subjects of operation
for putting the pastoral care of the family into practice. In this sense
every local church and, in more particular terms, every parochial community
must become more vividly aware of the grace and responsibility that it
receives from the Lord in order that it may promote the pastoral care
of the family. No plan for organized pastoral work at any level must ever
fail to take into consideration the pastoral area of the family.
Also to be seen in the light of this responsibility is the importance
of the proper preparation of all those who will be more specifically engaged
in this kind of apostolate. Priests and men and women religious from the
time of their formation should be oriented and trained progressively and
thoroughly for the various tasks. Among the various initiatives I am pleased
to emphasize the recent establishment in Rome, at the Pontifical Lateran
University, a higher institute for the study of the problems of the family.
Institutes of this kind have also been set up in some dioceses. Bishops
should see to it that as many priests as possible attend specialized courses
there before taking on parish responsibilities. Elsewhere, formation courses
are periodically held at higher institutes of theological and pastoral
studies. Such initiatives should be encouraged, sustained, increased in
number, and of course are also open to lay people who intend to use their
professional skills (medial, legal, psychological, social or educational)
to help the family.
71. The family. ---------------
Nut it is especially necessary to recognize the unique place that in this
field belongs to the mission of married couples and Christian families
by virtue of the grace received in the sacrament. This mission must be
placed at the service of the building up of the church, the establishing
of the kingdom of God in history. This is demanded as an act of docile
obedience to Christ the Lord. For it is he who, by virtue of the fact
that marriage of baptized persons has been raised to a sacrament, confers
upon Christian married couples a special mission as apostles, sending
them as workers into his vineyard and in a very special way into this
field of the family.
In this activity married couples act in communion and collaboration with
the other members of the church, who also work for the family, contributing
their own gifts and ministries. This apostolate will be exercised in the
first place within the families of those concerned, through the witness
of a life lived in conformity with the divine law in all its aspects,
through the Christian formation of the children, through helping them
to mature in faith, through education to chastity, through preparation
for life, through vigilance in protecting them from the ideological and
moral dangers with which they are often threatened, through their gradual
and responsible inclusion in the ecclesial community and the civil community,
through help and advice in choosing a vocation, through mutual help among
family members for human and Christian growth together, and so on. The
apostolate of the family will also become wider through works of spiritual
and material charity toward other families, especially those most in need
of help and support, toward the poor, the sick, the old, the handicapped,
orphans, widows, spouses that have been abandoned, unmarried mothers and
mothers-to-be in difficult situations who are tempted to have recourse
to abortion, and so on.
72. Associations of families for families. ------------------------------------------
Still within the church, which is the subject responsible for the pastoral
care of the family, mention should be made of the various groupings of
members of the faithful in which the mystery of Christ's church is in
some measure manifested and lived. One should therefore recognize and
make good use of -- each one in relationship to its own characteristics,
purposes, effectiveness and methods -- the different ecclesial communities,
the various groups and the numerous movements engaged in various ways,
for different reasons and at different levels, in the pastoral care of
the family.
For this reason the synod expressly recognized the useful contribution
made by such associations of spirituality, formation and apostolate. It
will be their task to foster among the faithful a lively sense of solidarity,
to favor a manner of living inspired by the Gospel and by the faith of
the church, to form consciences according to Christian values and not
according to the standards of public opinion; to stimulate people to perform
works of charity for one another and for others with a spirit of openness
which will make Christian families into a true source of light and a wholesome
leaven for other families.
It is similarly desirable that, with a lively sense of the common good,
Christian families should become actively engaged at every level in other
non-ecclesial associations as well. Some of these associations work for
the preservation, transmission and protection of the wholesome ethical
and cultural values of each people, the development of the human person,
the medical, juridical and social protection of mothers and young children,
the just advancement of women and the struggle against all that is detrimental
to their dignity, the increase of mutual solidarity, knowledge of the
problems connected with the responsible regulation of fertility in accordance
with natural methods that are in conformity with human dignity and the
teaching of the church.
Other associations work for the building of a more just and human world;
for the promotion of just laws favoring the right social order with full
respect for the dignity and every legitimate freedom of the individual
and the family on both the national and the international level' for collaboration
with the school and with the other institutions that complete the education
of children, and so forth.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
III. AGENTS OF THE PASTORAL CARE OF THE FAMILY. -----------------------------------------------
As well as the family, which is the object but above all the subject of
pastoral care of the family, one must also mention the other agents in
this particular sector.
73. Bishops and priests. ------------------------
The person principally responsible in the diocese for the pastoral care
of the family is the bishop. As father and pastor, he must exercise particular
solicitude in this clearly priority sector of pastoral care. He must devote
to it personal interest, care, time, personnel and resources, but above
all personal support for the families and for all those who, in the various
diocesan structures, assist him in the pastoral care of the family.
It will be his particular care to make the diocese ever more truly a "diocesan
family," a model and source of hope for many families that belong
to it. The setting up of the Pontifical Council for the family is to be
seen in this light to be a sign of the importance that I attribute to
pastoral care for the family in the world, and at the same time to be
an effective instrument for aiding and promoting it at every level.
The bishops avail themselves especially of the priests, whose task --
as the synod expressly emphasized -- constitutes an essential part of
the church's ministry regarding marriage and the family. The same is true
of deacons to whose care this sector of pastoral work may be entrusted.
Their responsibility extends not only to moral and liturgical matters,
but to personal and social matters as well. They must support the family
in its difficulties and sufferings, caring for its members and helping
them to see their lives in the light of the Gospel. It is not superfluous
to note that from this mission, if it is exercised with due discernment
and with a truly apostolic spirit, the minister of the church draws fresh
encouragement and spiritual energy for his own vocation, too, and for
the exercise of his ministry.
Priests and deacons, when they have received timely and serious preparation
for this apostolate, must unceasingly act toward families as fathers,
brothers, pastors and teachers, assisting them with the means of grace
and enlightening them with the light of truth. Their teaching and advice
must therefore always be in harmony with the authentic magisterium of
the church, in such a way as to help the people of God to gain a correct
sense of the faith to be subsequently applied to practical life. Such
fidelity to the magisterium will also enable priests to make every effort
to be united in their judgements in order to avoid troubling the consciences
of the faithful.
In the church, the pastors and the laity share in the prophetic mission
of Christ: The laity do so by witnessing to the faith by their words and
by their Christian lives; the pastors do so by distinguishing in that
witness what is the expression of genuine faith from what is less in harmony
with the light of faith; the family, as a Christian community, does so
through its special sharing and witness of faith.
Thus there begins a dialogue also between pastors and families. Theologians
and experts in family matters can be of great help in this dialogue. By
explaining exactly the content of the church's magisterium and the content
of the experience of family life. In this way the teaching of the magisterium
becomes better understood and the way is opened to its progressive development.
But it is useful to recall that the proximate and obligatory norm in the
teaching of the faith -- also concerning family matters -- belongs to
the hierarchical magisterium. Clearly defined relationships between theologians,
experts in family matters and the magisterium are of no little assistance
for the correct understanding of the faith and for promoting -- within
the boundaries of the faith -- legitimate pluralism.
74. Men and women religious. ----------------------------
The contribution that can be made to the apostolate of the family by men
and women religious and consecrated persons in general finds its primacy,
fundamental and original expression precisely in their consecration to
God. By reason of this consecration, "for all Christ's faithful religious
recall that wonderful marriage made by God, which will be fully manifested
in the future age, and in which the church has Christ for her only spouse"
[169], and they are witnesses to that universal charity which, through
chastity embraced for the kingdom of heaven, makes them ever more available
to dedicate themselves generously to the service of God and to the works
of the apostolate.
Hence the possibility for men and women religious and members of secular
institutes and other institutes of perfection, either individually or
in groups, to develop their service to families, with particular solicitude
for children, especially if they are abandoned, unwanted, orphaned, poor
or handicapped. They can also visit families and look after the sick;
they can foster relationships of respect and charity toward one-parent
families or families that are in difficulties or are separated; they can
offer their own work of teaching and counseling in the preparation of
young people for marriage and in helping couples toward truly responsible
parenthood; they can open their own houses for simple and cordial hospitality
so that families can find there the sense of God's presence and gain a
taste for prayer and recollection and see the practical examples of lives
lived in charity and fraternal joy as members of the larger family of
God.
I would like to add a most pressing exhortation to the heads of institutes
of consecrated life to consider -- always with substantial respect for
the proper and original charism of each one -- the apostolate of the family
as one of the priority tasks rendered even more urgent by the present
state of the world.
75. Lay specialists. --------------------
Considerable help can be given to families by lay specialists (doctors,
lawyers, psychologists, social workers, consultants, etc.) who either
as individuals or as members of various associations and undertakings
offer their contribution of enlightenment, advice, orientation and support.
TO these people one can well apply the exhortations that I had the occasion
to address to the Confederation of Family Advisory Bureaus of Christian
Inspiration:
"Yours is a commitment that well deserves the title of mission, so
noble are the aims that it pursues, and so determining, for the good of
society and the Christian community itself, are the results that derive
from it ... All that you succeed in doing to support the family is determined
to have an effectiveness that goes beyond its own sphere and reaches other
people too, and has an effect on society. The future of the world and
of the church passes through the family" [170].
76. Recipients and agents of social communications. ---------------------------------------------------
This very important category in modern life deserves a word of its own.
It is well know that the means of social communication "affect and
often profoundly, the minds of those who use them, under the affective
and intellectual aspect and also under the moral and religious aspect,"
especially in the case of young people [171]. They can thus exercise a
beneficial influence on the life and habits of the family and on the education
of children, but at the same time they also conceal "snares and dangers
that cannot be ignored" [172]. They could also become a vehicle --
sometimes cleverly and systematically manipulated, as unfortunately happens
in various countries of the world -- for divisive ideologies and distorted
ways of looking at life, the family, religion and morality, attitudes
that lack respect for man's true dignity and destiny.
This danger is all the more real inasmuch as "the modern lifestyle
-- especially in the more industrialized nations -- all too often causes
families to abandon their responsibility to educate their children. Evasion
of this duty is made easy for them by the presence of television and certain
publications in the home, and in this way they keep their children's time
and energies occupied" [173]. Hence "the duty ... to protect
the young from the forms of aggression they are subjected to by the mass
media," and to ensure that the use of the media in the family is
carefully regulated. Families should also take care to seek for their
children often forms of entertainment that are more wholesome, useful
and physically, morally and spiritually formative, "to develop and
use to advantage the free time of the young and direct their energies"
[174].
Furthermore, because the means of social communication, like the school
and the environment, often have a notable influence on the formation of
children, parents as recipients must actively ensure the moderate, critical,
watchful and prudent use of the media by discovering what effect they
have on their children and by controlling the use of media in such a way
as to "train the conscience of their children to express calm and
objective judgements, which will then guide them in the choice or rejection
of programs available" [175].
With equal commitment parents will endeavor to influence the selection
and preparation of the programs themselves by keeping in contact -- through
suitable initiatives -- with those in charge of the various phases of
production and transmission. In this way they will ensure that fundamental
human values that form part of the true good of society are not ignored
or deliberately attacked. Rather they will ensure the broadcasting of
programs that present in the right light family problems and their proper
solutions. In this regard my venerated predecessor Paul VI wrote:
"Producers must know and respect the needs of the family, and this
sometimes presupposes in them true courage, and always a high sense of
responsibility. In fact they are expected to avoid anything that could
harm the family in its existence, its stability, its balance and its happiness.
Every attack on the fundamental value of the family -- meaning eroticism
or violence, the defense of divorce or of anti-social attitudes among
young people -- is an attack on the true good of man" [176].
I myself, on a similar occasion, pointed out that families "to a
considerable extent need to be able to count on the good will, integrity
and sense of responsibility of the media professionals -- publishers,
writers, producers, directors, playwrights, newsmen, commentators and
actors" [177]. It is therefore also the duty of the church to continue
to devote every care to these categories, at the same time encouraging
and supporting Catholics who feel the call and have the necessary talents
to take up this sensitive type of work.
------------------------------------------------------------------- Footnotes:
[169] Second Vatican Council, PERFECTAE CARITATIS, 12.
[170] John Paul II, Address to the Confederation of Family Advisory Bureaus
of Christian Inspiration (Nov. 29, 1980), 3-4: INSEGNAMENTI III, 2 (1980),
1453-1454.
[171] Paul VI, Message for the Third Social Communications Day (April
7, 1969): AAS 61 (1969), 455.
[172] John Paul II, Message for the 1980 World Social Communications Day
(May 1, 1980): INSEGNAMENTI III, 1 (1980), 1042.
[173] John Paul II, Message for the 1981 World Social Communications Day
(May 10, 1981): L'Osservatore Romano, May 22, 1981.
[174] Ibid.
[175] Paul VI, Message for the Third Social Communications Day (April
7, 1969): AAS 61 (1969), 456.
[176] John Paul II, Message for the 1980 World Social Communications Day,
loc. cit. 1044.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
IV. PASTORAL CARE OF THE FAMILY IN DIFFICULT CASES. ---------------------------------------------------
77. Particular circumstances. -----------------------------
An even more generous, intelligent and prudent pastoral commitment, modeled
on the Good Shepherd, is called for in the case of families which, often
independently of their own wishes and through pressures of various other
kinds, find themselves faced by situations which are objectively difficult.
In this regard it is necessary to call special attention to certain particular
groups which are more in need not only of assistance but also of more
incisive action upon public opinion and especially upon cultural, economic
and juridical structures, in order that the profound causes of their needs
may be eliminated as far as possible.
Such, for example, are the families of migrant workers; the families of
those obliged to be away for long periods of times, such as members of
the armed forces, sailors and all kinds of itinerant people; the families
of those in prison, of refugees and exiles; the families in big cities
living, practically speaking as outcasts; families with no home; incomplete
or single-parent families; families with children that are handicapped
or addicted to drugs; the families of alcoholics; families that have been
uprooted from their cultural and social environment or are in danger of
losing it; families discriminated against for political or other reasons;
families that are ideologically divided; families that are unable to make
ready contact with the parish; families experiencing violence or unjust
treatment because of their faith; teen-age married couples; the elderly,
who are often obliged to live alone with inadequate means of subsistence.
The families of migrants, especially in the case of manual workers and
farm workers, should be able to find a homeland everywhere in the church.
This is a task stemming from the nature of the church, as being the sign
of unity in diversity. As far as possible these people should be looked
after by priests of their own rite, culture and language. It is also the
church's task to appeal to the public conscience and to all those in authority
in social, economic and political life, in order that workers may find
employment in their own regions and homelands, that they may receive just
wages, that their families may be reunited as soon as possible, be respected
in their cultural identity and treated on an equal footing with others,
and that their children may be given the chance to learn a trade or exercise
it, as also the change to own the land needed for working and living.
A difficult problem is that of the family which is ideologically divided.
In these cases particular pastoral care is needed. In the first place
it is necessary to maintain tactful personal contact with such families.
The believing members must be strengthened in their faith and supported
in their Christian lives. Although the party faithful to Catholicism cannot
give way, dialogue with the other party must be kept alive. Love and respect
must be freely shown in the firm hope that unity will be maintained. Much
also depends on the relationship between parents and children. Moreover,
ideologies which are alien to the faith can stimulate the believing members
of the family to grow in faith and in the witness of love.
Other difficult circumstances in which the family needs the help of the
ecclesial community and its pastors are: the children's adolescence, which
can be disturbed, rebellious and sometimes stormy; the children's marriage,
which takes them away from their family; lack of understanding or lack
of love on the part of those held most dear; abandonment or neglect on
the part of children and relations. There is also suffering caused by
ill-health, by the gradual loss of strength, by the humiliation of having
to depend on others, by the sorrow of feeling of the end of life. These
are the circumstances in which, as the synod fathers suggested, it is
easier to help people understand and live the lofty aspects of the spirituality
of marriage and the family, aspects which take their inspiration from
the value of Christ's cross and resurrection, the source of sanctification
and profound happiness in daily life, in the light of the great eschatological
realities of eternal life.
In all these different situations let prayer, the source of light and
strength and the nourishment of Christian hope, never be neglected.
78. Mixed Marriages. --------------------
The growing number of mixed marriages between Catholics and other baptized
persons also calls for special pastoral attention in the light of the
directives and norms contained in the most recent documents of the Holy
See and in those drawn up by the episcopal conferences, in order to permit
their practical application to the various situations.
Couples living in a mixed marriage have special needs, which can be put
under three main headings.
In the first place, attention must be paid to the obligations that faith
imposes on the Catholic party with regard to the free exercise of the
faith and the consequent obligation to ensure, as far as is possible,
the baptism and upbringing of the children in the Catholic faith [178].
There must be borne in mind the particular difficulties inherent in the
relationships between husband and wife with regard to respect for religious
freedom: This freedom could be violated either by undue pressure to make
the partner change his or her beliefs or by placing obstacles in the way
of the free manifestation of these beliefs by religious practice.
With regard to the liturgical and canonical form of marriage, ordinaries
can make wide use of their faculties to meet various necessities.
In dealing with these special needs, the following points should be kept
in mind:
-- In the appropriate preparation for this type of marriage every reasonable
effort must be made to ensure proper understanding of Catholic teaching
on the qualities and obligations of marriage and also to ensure that the
pressures and obstacles mentioned above will not occur.
-- It is of the greatest importance that through the support of the community
the Catholic party should be strengthened in faith and positively helped
to mature in understanding and practicing that faith so as to become a
credible witness within the family through his or her own life and through
the quality of love shown to the other spouse and the children.
Marriages between Catholics and other baptized persons have their particular
nature, but they contain numerous elements that could well be made good
use of and developed, both for their intrinsic value and for thee contribution
that they can make to the ecumenical movement. This is particularly true
when both parties are faithful to their religious duties. Their common
baptism and the dynamism of grace provide the spouses in these marriages
with the basis and motivations for expressing their unity in the sphere
of moral and spiritual values.
For this purpose and also in order to highlight the ecumenical importance
of mixed marriages which are fully lived in the faith of the two Christian
spouses an effort should be made to establish cordial cooperation between
the Catholic and non-Catholic ministers from the time that preparations
begin for the marriage and the wedding ceremony even though this does
not always prove easy.
With regard to the sharing of the non-Catholic party in eucharistic communion,
the norms issued by the Secretariat for Promoting Christian Unity should
be followed [179].
Today in many parts of the world marriages between Catholics and non-baptized
persons are growing in numbers. In many such marriages the non-baptized
partner professes another religion and his beliefs are to be treated with
respect in accordance with the principles set out in the Second Vatican
Council's declaration NOSTRA AETATE on relations with non-Christian religions.
But in many other such marriages, particularly in secularized societies,
the non-baptized person professes no religion at all. In these marriages
there is a need for episcopal conferences and for individual bishops to
ensure that there are proper pastoral safeguards for the faith of the
Catholic partner and for the free exercise of his faith, above all in
regard to his duty to do all in his power to ensure the Catholic baptism
and education of the children of the marriage. Likewise the Catholic must
be assisted in every possible way to offer within his family a genuine
witness to the Catholic faith and to Catholic life.
79. Pastoral action in certain irregular situations. ----------------------------------------------------
In its solicitude to protect the family in all its dimensions, not only
the religious one, the Synod of Bishops did not fail to take into careful
consideration certain situations which are irregular in a religious sense
and often in the civil sense too. Such situations, as a result of today's
rapid cultural changes, are unfortunately becoming widespread also among
Catholics with no little damage to the very institution of the family
and to society, of which the family constitutes the basic cell.
80.a. Trial marriages. ----------------------
A first example of an irregular situation is provided by what are called
"trial marriages," which many people today would like to justify
attributing a certain value to them. But human reason leads one to see
that they are unacceptable, by showing the unconvincing nature of carrying
out an "experiment" with human beings, whose dignity demands
that they should be always and solely the term of a self-giving love without
limitations of time or of any other circumstance.
The church, for her part, cannot admit such a kind of union for further
and original reasons which derive from faith. For, in the first place,
the gift of the body in the sexual relationship is a real symbol of the
giving of the whole person: Such a giving, moreover, in the present state
of things cannot take place with full truth without the concourse of the
love of charity, given by Christ. In the second place, marriage between
two baptized persons is a real symbol of the union of Christ and the church,
which is not a temporary or "trial" union, but one which is
eternally faithful. Therefore between two baptized persons there can exist
only an indissoluble marriage.
Such a situation cannot usually be overcome unless the human person from
childhood, with the help of Christ's grace and without fear, has been
trained to dominate concupiscence from the beginning and to establish
relationships of genuine love with other people. This cannot be secured
without a true education in genuine love and in the right use of sexuality,
such as to introduce the human person in every aspect, and therefore the
bodily aspect too, into the fullness of the mystery of Christ.
It will be very useful to investigate the causes of this phenomenon, including
its psychological and sociological aspect, in order to find the proper
remedy.
81.b. De facto free unions. ---------------------------
This means unions without any publicly recognized institutional bond,
either civil or religious. This phenomenon, which is becoming ever more
frequent, cannot fail to concern pastors of souls, also because it may
be based on widely varying factors, the consequences of which may perhaps
be containable by suitable action.
Some people consider themselves almost forced into a free union by difficult
economic, cultural or religious situations, on the grounds that if they
would be exposed to some form of harm, would lose economic advantages,
would be discriminated against, etc. In other cases, however, one encounters
people who scorn, rebel against or reject society, the institution of
the family and the social and political order, or who are solely seeking
pleasure. Then there are those who are driven to such situations by extreme
ignorance or poverty, sometimes by a conditioning due to situations of
real injustice or by a certain psychological immaturity that makes them
uncertain or afraid to enter into a stable and definitive union. In some
countries traditional customs presume that the true and proper marriage
will take place only after a period of cohabitation and the birth of the
first child.
Each of these elements presents the church with arduous pastoral problems,
by reason of the serious consequences deriving from them, both religious
and moral (the loss of the religious sense of marriage seen grace of the
sacrament; grave scandal) and also social consequences (the destruction
of the concept of the family; the weakening of the sense of fidelity,
also toward society; possible psychological damage to the children; the
strengthening of selfishness).
The pastors and the ecclesial community should take care to become acquainted
with such situations and their actual causes, case by case. They should
make tactful and respectful contact with the couples concerned and enlighten
them patiently, correct them charitably and show them the witness of the
Christian family life in such a way as to smooth the path for them to
regularize their situation. But above all there must be a campaign of
prevention, by fostering the sense of fidelity in the whole moral and
religious training of the young, instructing them concerning the conditions
and structures that favor such fidelity, without which there is no true
freedom; they must be helped to reach spiritual maturity and enabled to
understand the rich human and supernatural reality of marriage as a sacrament.
82. c. Catholics in civil marriages. ------------------------------------
There are increasing cases of Catholics who for ideological or practical
reasons prefer to contract a merely civil marriage and who reject or at
least defer religious marriage. Their situation cannot, of course, be
likened to that of people simply living together without any bond at all,
because in the present case there is at least a certain commitment to
a properly defined and probably stable state of life even though the possibility
of a future divorce is often present in the minds of those entering a
civil marriage. By seeking public recognition of their bond on the part
of the state, such couples show that they are ready to accept not only
its advantages but also its obligations. Nevertheless, not even this situation
is acceptable to the church.
The aim of pastoral action will be to make these people understand the
need for consistency between their choice of life and the faith that they
profess, and to try to do everything possible to induce them to regularize
their situation in the light of Christian principles. While treating them
with great charity and bringing them into the life of the respective communities,
the pastors of the church will regrettably not be able to admit them to
the sacraments.
83. d. Separated or divorced persons who have not remarried. -----------------------------------------------------------
Various reasons can unfortunately lead to the often irreparable breakdown
of valid marriages. These include mutual lack of understanding and the
inability to enter into interpersonal relationships. Obviously, separation
must be considered as a last resort, after all other reasonable attempts
at reconciliation have proved vain.
Loneliness and other difficulties are often the lot of separated spouses
especially when they are the innocent parties. The ecclesial community
must support such people more than ever. It must give them much respect,
solidarity, understanding and practical help, so that they can preserve
their fidelity even in their difficult situation; and it must help them
to cultivate the need to forgive which is inherent in Christian love and
to be ready perhaps to return to their former married life.
The situation is similar for people who have undergone divorce, but, being
well aware that the valid marriage bond is indissoluble, refrain from
becoming involved in a new union and devote themselves solely to carrying
out their family duties and the responsibilities of Christian life. In
such cases their example of fidelity and Christian consistency takes on
particular value as a witness before the world and the church. Here it
is even more necessary for the church to offer continual love and assistance
without there being an obstacle to admission to the sacraments.
84. e. Divorced persons who have remarried. -------------------------------------------
Daily experience unfortunately shows that people who have obtained a divorce
usually intend to enter into a new union, obviously not with a Catholic
religious ceremony. Since this is an evil that like the others is affecting
more and more Catholics as well, the problem must be faced with resolution
and without delay. The synod fathers studied it expressly. The church,
which was set up to lead to salvation all people and especially the baptized,
cannot abandon to their own devices those who have been previously bound
by sacramental marriage and who have attempted a second marriage. The
church will therefore make untiring efforts to put at their disposal her
means of salvation.
Pastors must know that for the sake of truth they are obliged to exercise
careful discernment of situations. There is, in fact, a difference between
those who have sincerely tried to save their first marriage and have been
unjustly abandoned and those who, through their own grave fault, have
destroyed a canonically valid marriage.
Finally, there are those who have entered into a second union for the
sake of the children's upbringing and who are sometimes subjectively certain
in conscience that their previous irreparably destroyed marriage had never
been valid.
Together with the synod, I earnestly call upon pastors and the whole community
of the faithful to help the divorced and with solicitous care to make
sure that they do not consider themselves as separated from the church,
for as baptized persons they can and indeed must share in her life. They
should be encouraged to listen to the word of God, to attend the sacrifice
of the Mass, to persevere in prayer, to contribute to works of charity
and to the community effort in favor of justice, to bring up their children
in the Christian faith, to cultivate the spirit and practice of penance
and thus implore, day by day, God's grace. Let the church pray for them,
encourage them and show herself a merciful mother and thus sustain them
in faith and hope.
However, the church reaffirms her practice, which is based upon sacred
scripture, of not admitting to eucharistic communion divorced persons
who have remarried. They are unable to be admitted thereto from the fact
that their state and condition of life objectively contradict that union
of love between Christ and the church which is signified and effected
by the eucharist. Besides this there is another special pastoral reason:
If these people were admitted to the eucharist the faithful would be led
into error and confusion regarding the church's teaching about the indissolubility
of marriage.
Reconciliation in the sacrament of penance, which would open the way to
the eucharist, can only be granted to those who, repenting of having broken
the sign of the covenant and of fidelity to Christ, are sincerely ready
to undertake a way of life that is no longer in contradiction to the indissolubility
of marriage.
This means, in practice, that when, for serious reasons such as, for example,
the children's upbringing, a man and a woman cannot satisfy the obligation
to separate, they "take on themselves the duty to live in complete
continence, that is, by abstinence from the acts proper to married couples"
[180].
Similarly, the respect due to the sacrament of matrimony, to the couples
themselves and their families, and also to the community of the faithful
forbids any pastor for whatever reason or pretext, even of a pastoral
nature, to perform ceremonies of any kind for divorced people who remarry.
Such ceremonies would give the impression of the celebration of a new,
sacramentally valid marriage and would thus lead people into error concerning
the indissolubility of a validly contracted marriage.
By acting in this way the church professes her own fidelity to Christ
and to his truth. At the same time she shows motherly concern for these
children of hers, especially those who, through no fault of their own,
have been abandoned by their legitimate partner.
With firm confidence she believes that those who have rejected the Lord's
command and are still living in this state will be able to obtain from
God the grace of conversion and salvation, provided that they have persevered
in prayer, penance and charity.
85. Those without a family. ---------------------------
I wish to add a further word for a category of people whom, as a result
of actual circumstances in which they are living, and this often not through
their own deliberate wish, I consider particularly close to the heart
of Christ and deserving of the affection and active solicitude of the
church and of pastors.
There exist in the world countless people who unfortunately cannot in
any sense claim membership in what could be called, in the proper sense,
a family. Large sections of humanity live in conditions of extreme poverty
in which promiscuity, lack of housing, the irregular nature and instability
of relationships and the extreme lack of education make it impossible
in practice to speak of a true family. There are others who for various
reasons have been left alone in the world. And yet for all of these people
there exists a "good news of the family."
On behalf of those living in extreme poverty I have already spoken of
the urgent need to work courageously in order to find solutions also at
the political level, which will make it possible to help them and to overcome
this inhuman condition of degradation.
It is a special task that faces the whole of society, but in a special
way the authorities, by reason of their position and the responsibilities
flowing therefrom, and also families, which must show great understanding
and willingness to help.
For those who have no natural family the doors of the great family which
is the church -- the church which finds concrete expression in the diocesan
and the parish family, in ecclesial basic communities and in movements
of the apostolate -- must be opened even wider. No one is without a family
in this world: The church is a home and family for everyone, especially
those who "labor and are heavy laden" [181].
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Footnotes:
[178] Cf. Paul VI, Motu Proprio MATRIMONIA MIXTA, 4-5: AAS 62 (1970).
[179] Instruction IN QUIBUS RERUM CIRCUMSTANTIIS (June 15, 1972): AAS
64 (1972), 518-525; Note on Oct. 17, 1973; AAS 65 (1973), 616- 619.
[180] John Paul II, Homily at the Close of the Sixth Synod of Bishops,
7 (Oct. 25, 1980): AAS 72 (1980), 1082.
[181] Mt. 11:28.
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86. CONCLUSION. ---------------
At the end of this apostolic exhortation my thoughts turn with earnest
solicitude:
To you, married couples, to you fathers and mothers of families;
To you, young men and women, the future and the hope of the church and
the world, destined to be the dynamic central nucleus of the family in
the approaching third millennium;
To you, venerable and dear brothers in the episcopate and in the priesthood,
beloved sons and daughters in the religious life, souls consecrated to
the Lord, who bear witness before married couples to the ultimate reality
of the love of God;
To you, upright men and women, who for any reason whatever give thought
to the fate of the family.
The future of humanity passes by way of the family.
It is therefore indispensable and urgent that every person of good will
should endeavor to save and foster the values and requirements of the
family.
I feel that I must ask for a particular effort in this field from the
sons and daughters of the church. Faith gives them full knowledge of God's
wonderful plan: They therefore have an extra reason for caring for the
reality that is the family in this time of trial and of grace.
They must show the family special love. This is an injunction that calls
for concrete action.
Loving the family means being able to appreciate its values and capabilities,
fostering them always. Loving the family means identifying the dangers
and the evils that menace it in order to overcome them. Loving the family
means endeavoring to create for it an environment favorable for this development.
The modern Christian family is often tempted to be discouraged and is
distressed at the growth of its difficulties; it is an eminent form of
love to give it back its reasons for confidence in itself, in the riches
that it possesses by nature and grace, and in the mission that God has
entrusted to it. "Yes, indeed, the families of today must be called
back to their original position. They must follow Christ" [182].
Christians also have the mission of proclaiming with joy and conviction
the good news about the family, for the family absolutely needs to hear
ever anew and to understand ever more deeply the authentic words that
reveal its identity, its inner resources and the importance of its mission
in the city of God and in that of man.
The church knows the path by which the family can reach the heart of the
deepest truth about itself. The church has learned this path at the school
of Christ and the school of history interpreted in the light of the Spirit.
She does not impose it, but she feels an urgent need to propose it to
everyone without fear and indeed with great confidence and hope, although
she knows that the good news includes the subject of the cross. But it
is through the cross that the family can attain the fullness of its being
and the perfection of its love.
Finally, I wish to call on all Christians to collaborate cordially and
courageously with all people of good will who are serving the family in
accordance with their responsibilities. The individuals and groups, movements
and associations in the church which devote themselves to the family's
welfare, acting in the Church's name and under her inspiration, often
find themselves side by side with other individuals and institutions working
for the same ideal. With faithfulness to the values of the Gospel and
of the human person and with respect for lawful pluralism in initiatives,
this collaboration can favor a more rapid and integral advancement of
the family.
And now, at the end of my pastoral message, which is intended to draw
everyone's attention to the demanding yet fascinating roles of the Christian
family, I wish to invoke the protection of the Holy Family of Nazareth.
Through God's mysterious design, it was in that family that the Son of
God spent long years of a hidden life. It is therefore the prototype and
example for all Christian families. It was unique in the world. Its life
was passed in anonymity and silence in a little town in Palestine. It
underwent trials of poverty, persecution and exile. It glorified God in
an incomparably exalted and pure way. And it will not fail to help Christian
families -- indeed all the families of the world -- to be faithful to
their day-to-day duties, to bear the cares and tribulations of life, to
be open and generous to the needs of others and to fulfill with joy the
plan of God in their regard.
St. Joseph was "a just man", a tireless worker, the upright
guardian of those entrusted to his care. May he always guard, protect
and enlighten families.
May the Virgin Mary, who is the mother of the church, also be the mother
of "the church of the home." Thanks to her motherly aid, may
each Christian family really become a "little church" in which
the mystery of the church of Christ is mirrored and given a new life May
she, the handmaid of the Lord, be an example of humble and generous acceptance
of the will of God. May she, the sorrowful mother at the foot of the cross,
comfort the sufferings and dry the tears of those in distress because
of the difficulties of their families.
May Christ the Lord, the universal king, the king of families, be present
in every Christian home as he was at Cana, bestowing light, joy, serenity
and strength. On the solemn day dedicated to his kingship I beg of him
that every family may generously make its own contribution to the coming
of his kingdom in the world -- "a kingdom of truth and life, a kingdom
of holiness and grace, a kingdom of justice, love and peace" [183],
toward which history is journeying.
I entrust each family to him, to Mary and to Joseph. To their hands and
their hearts I offer this exhortation: May it be they who present it to
you, venerable brothers and beloved sons and daughters, and may it be
they who open your hearts to the light that the Gospel sheds on every
family.
I assure you all of my constant prayers and I cordially impart the apostolic
blessing to each and every one of you, in the name of the Father, and
of the Son and of the Holy Spirit.
Given in Rome, at St. Peter's, Nov. 22, 1981, the solemnity of our Lord
Jesus Christ, universal king, the fourth of the pontificate.
John Paul II.
------------------------------------------------------------------- Footnotes:
[182] John Paul II, Letter APPROPINQUAT IAM (Aug. 15, 1980), 1: AAS 72
(1980), 791.
[183] The Roman Missal, Preface of Christ the King.
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